Whats wrong with me being happy? Pt.1

Ok, I am so sick of getting heat from all different sorts of people about Simon.. so if you dont want to see me blab about him on and on, then stop reading my goddamn diary! Im so tired of people saying shit!

Ok, first off there’s Marcus.. Im not really mad at him but usually end up feeling bad. Am I such a horrible person? Am I now comdemned to hell? I am such a people pleaser.. I dont know how to make him happy, and make myself happy at the same time right now.Im scared to talk to him about Simon, because I dont want to make him feel bad.At the same time I write in my diary about Simon so much, because its my fucking DIARY and I want to remember everything that has happened.And things I usually do during the day involve Simon. So its not a big damn deal that I write about him in my diary, so everyone needs to get over it.

Then there’s some freshman bitch named Chasity.. shes some stupid whore, and has apparently been in love with Simon since the first day of school that he was there. Well, she was telling people that the two of them were going out, and Simon knew nothing about this.. he cant even stand her. And when me and Simon started being together a lot, she then told everyone that he had broken up with her. Now, me and Simon are together all the time and I guess the stupid little bitch is mad because shes thinking that I stole her man, or something.. and if she wants to start something with me, then thats fine. Im really not the type to back down.. But damn, Simon never even liked her.. he turned her down tons of times when she was asking him out.. but the bitch had to make up lies about them being together, and then get pissed at me when she found out me and him were together. Oh well, Ill probably end up kicking her ass one day.

Then there’s my friend Autumn.. she says I have been acting differently, and I have been but only because of the fact that whenever I try to say anything to her, she sounds majorly pissed. So I was like “Screw it!” and just didnt talk to her. But apparently that wasnt the right thing to do either. She thinks I have been spending a lot of time with Simon lately, and of course I have only because its the beginning of the relationship. But that shits normal. But my friend Valerie did the EXACT same thing last year when she started going out with Jarrod.. But I guess whenever she gets a man and goes through the same thing, she will understand. Im not gonna have Simon forever, and I should cherish the time I do have, and make the most of it.But Renee says I shouldnt get stressed about it, because I have done all I can, and can only hope that soon Autumn will understand..and thats just a problem Autumn will have to figure out for herself. I think Autumn is jealous that Im not spending all my time with her between classes and everything..but how was I supposed to know this when she wouldnt tell me what the hell was wrong? She said I wasnt trying to see her point of view, but its kinda hard when she wouldnt say anything about it to me,but would just snap at me whenever I would try to talk to her. Sure, i see her point of view. She doesnt see my point of view. And Im not just being selfish, at least Renee agrees with me.