Why don’t you leave?

If I had a dollar for every time I thought "why don’t you leave?" then…  then…  well, it’s a big ol’ bunch of money, for sure.  I could also ask a similar question:  why doesn’t *she* leave?  My guess is…  I’m the only unhappy one.

Really, what does she have to complain about?  I do most of the shopping and the cleaning and the laundry and the kid wrangling.  We split the cooking thing halfway.  I take care of all the finances and family travel plans.  I make my own breakfasts and lunches.  Yada yada yada.

I just don’t get her.  39 is NOT "too old" to improve your health and body, and yet she chooses to sit on her ass and do nothing.  Is the thought of having to exercise SO bad?  Is the challenge of sticking to a new & healthy routine SO frightening?  Is the excuse of "I have no time" SO appealing?  *sigh*

Yeah, why don’t I leave?  I see little chance for her to want to change.  All of the talks that we’ve had about it haven’t done anything.  My "leading by example" (in other words, my getting up early to walk 4+ miles most weekday mornings plus my making oatmeal, salads, tuna fish, and other healthy foods) hasn’t motivated her to action.  My lack of motivation for sex with her hasn’t prompted her to change her body.  Yeah, why don’t I leave?

I suppose it all comes down to convenience, money, and the comfort factor.  It’s convenient for me to go with the status quo.  I don’t have the money to waste on a divorce + apartment + child support.  I am comfortable being able to control my own little world and sphere of influence without much hassles from her.

Basically, I have no hope of hot sex with a sexually-appealing partner.  Instead, I have once-a-week OK-to-boring sex with my wife.  That’s how it’s gonna be, at least for now and possibly forever.