BF kind of paraniod…..

my new boyfriend is kinda paraniod i have alot of guy friends and he has been hurt alot in the past . i dont want to hurt him by going to see my guy buds but i also dont want to give up my friends when i have known them longer then i have known him his paranioa is really starting to bug me it makes it so i dont want to be around him what should i do ..Continued in next note and well if he doesnt start trusting me then i dont know if it will last . the other problem is my ex is his friend and keeps getting involved in out relationship he goes to my bf and tells him im cheating on him when im not . i mean i havent hung out with any of my friends since i started dating this guy and it just seems like he is smothering me and my ex doesnt want me to be with my new bf HELP

Trust is something you need in a relationship, with out it then no it wont last, but you have to be willing to take your time as well with him. You said he has been hurt in the past, well I know how it is to be hurt in relationships, and once you get hurt enough or big enough it will be hard for you to trust. I’m pretty sure he trusts you some, but he wont trust you 100% because it isn’t easy for him. I know it is hard to deal with someone not trusting you and making it hard on you, but it is hard for him as well, I know that I didn’t like the idea that I couldn’t trust and it was hard for me to care about someone but not trust then 100%.

What you need to do is be there for him, let him know that he can trust you, that you wont do anything with anyone else. It isn’t going to be easy on either of you at first, but in time you both can over come this. You can always talk to him about this. He may not believe you 100% at first, because it is hard for him to trust, even though he wants to there is still a part of him that isn’t going to let him, because he has been hurt in the past. You can always bring him along with you and your guy friends. Let him get to know them and see how they are. This may help him to know taht you or them wouldn’t do anything, that you wouldn’t hurt him that way.

I don’t know how he was hurt in the past, but I don’t have to know. Just because you knew your friends longer then your bf, don’t mean much really. Most people know there friends longer then there bf/gf’s, but that don’t mean that you can just give up that easly and not try and see if you can’t help and make it work. I’m not saying that is what you were going to do or anything I am just saying.

Your ex shouldn’t do that, but some people will do what ever and not care how they hurt people. It could be that your ex still likes you and doesn’t want you to be with your bf now because your ex wants you back. He may not have gotten over you yet and this is a way for him to try and break you and your bf up and maybe for your ex to have another chance. I don’t know for sure if that is it or your ex is just being a real ass. Your bf should know you well enough by now to know you wouldn’t do that, but if your ex tells him enough things, and maybe even tells your ex that you did some things with him when you two were going out your bf may start to believe him.

The best thing I can tell you is to talk to your bf, let him know how you feel about him, about your friends, let him know taht your bf is not telling the truth, let him know that you want to be with him, but it is starting to get hard on you. You know that it is for him as well, but you need know if he can trust you enough to know you woudln’t hurt him, that you wouldn’t cheat on him like your ex tells him. Anything that you can think to tell him that you want to tell him. Let him know that he can meet your friends and hang out with you and your friends, that you aren’t trying to hide them from him or anything like that.

I know it isn’t easy, but try and hang in there and just talk to your bf….even though without trust a relationship can’t work, but also if you can’t talk to one another then it can’t work either. Don’t be scared to talk to him, if you talk to him and tell him things you feel and all that will help him to trust you a bit more. I hope this helps you out, if you need anything else just let me know. Take Care!

Sex*Goddess

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