pornographic heart on

 

 

a string of words

given

and I hang myself by invisible nooses

breath in chaotic gasps

eyes huge

 

with limp arms

my body fights gravitational pulls

from a too bright sun

but still I cannot move

stuck in the cement of fucking heart

no where

to turn and I listen

to the silence of voices

beating

like drums inside my mind

 

I am not just anyone

I am

someone worth the effort it takes

to say what you

think
and the words matter when the actions

cannot be felt,

put on hold until roads converge

center stage

but the curtains close

and the lights

are off

 

castrated,

immersed in the lakes of life

and if you think

I’ll drown –

watch the way water glistens from skin</font

>

how my voice solidifies

and the curves

of woman

of me

fine tune themselves to the seduction

of the moon, my moon

 

it could be ours

 

if only you’d let yourself love

more

than just the freckles that winked at you

when our body

gyrated to the beat

of heart –

my eyes are clear but my heart

won’t fucking listen

and still

the bed is empty

and I long for something to tell me

it matters

 

a clichéd sign

in neon lights or the words to come

without me mentally

begging

 

I fucking love you

and I don’t always like that I do