It matters.

Sometimes I just want to sleep with a woman who wants to sleep with a woman. Not a woman who wants to sleep with a man.

Yeah, it’s one of *those* mental head-space days. The winter is always rough and this year hasn’t been an easy one.

We’ve gone from her saying "I think if I just get the domination part fullfilled then I will be able to have ‘regular’ sex." to her saying "I think I will always want to sleep with a guy. We just have to find one that you’re comfortable with. I know that won’t be for a very long time." 

This has been mulling over in my brain for a few days. I don’t really want it in my brain, but I can’t get it out. I’m starting to have the nightmares again…. the ones where I wake up remembering that she did and blaming her for it. I have got to be able to find forgiveness for that. I have got to be able to move on. But I think that’s an issue. She’s not really concerned with what happened, whereas I still am. As much as it *is* just my issue…. it’s not too. That’s what happens when you get married.

In regards to long term relationships: sex does matter.