The Gift in Front of my Door

Hi All,
I know I haven’t been faithful on here.  Depression has taken over on many days this season.  Part of my problem is the lack of finances to cover the cost of the medication.

The doctors put you on disability, but the State of WI and the Federal Government review what they want to review and then they decide what catagory you fit into.  I was denied my disability.  But I decided to appeal the process and called the state back and told them what I know about me and what they don’t know.  Basically I talked with this chick that has no clue what she’s doing and I said:  "have you ever been around someone that’s been off their psych meds?"  She’s like ‘no’.  I said:  well you don’t want to be around me right now.  I haven’t had any medication for 4 wks. and I need it, but I can’t get it because of the laws this state has created."  Wasn’t pretty.

Hey, how do you change your picture on here now?  I’ve tried several times and it won’t let me change the picture.

Anyway:  The Gift in Front of my Door.

Last night I was sitting here at the computer playing a game when all of a sudden someone pounded on my door.  Well, I was pretty leary, so I ignored the pounding.  Didn’t hear anything after that, so I decided to see if I could find anything in the hallway.  I opened the door and nothing was there except a gift, wrapped in gold wrapping paper with 4 little bows on the top.  No card, no name, nothing.  I bent over and picked it up and brought it in my apartment.

I could tell it was a CD.  So I opened the wrapping paper and found a U2-18 Singles CD.  Well, I have no idea who U2 is.  Yeah, I’m still into Southern Gospel, Jazz, Praise & Worship, 50’s, 60’s.  I’m old school.  I take the CD out of the saran, and I pull out the lyrics pages.

It’s weird, because every song on here is relational.  Like:  "I miss you baby."  "I can’t live without you."  "You make me feel………." 

The other weird thing about this is:

4 weeks ago I helped Andy get his own apartment and I helped him fill it with furniture.  Since then he hasn’t spoke to me.  In fact he blocked my email address, told me not to stick any notes under his door, don’t bother him, don’t call, blah, blah, blah.  So I haven’t.  I haven’t even seen him in the building.  I asked my friend Chris who is also a mutual friend of Andy and he hasn’t seen him either. 

So, by deduction I know the CD didn’t come from Andy.  Now just to find out who it came from and who it really belongs too.  I’d like to give it to it’s rightful owner.  I mean it’s not like the music is bad or anything.  It’s just not something I’d listen to frequently.

I’m actually listening to the CD right now and the song that is playing is: "Sometimes You Can’t Make It On Your Own."

This is weird.  Because before Andy quit talking to me, this was the subject we’d been talking about.  I told him that I can’t do this by myself anymore.  I need help financially, mentally, emotionally, etc..

Now to have this song playing and Andy’s not here.  The weirdness continues.

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January 26, 2011

So sorry your going through such a rough time. I hope doors are opened for you soon. Have you tried PPA for help with your meds?

January 27, 2011

Interesting. I bet it is from Andy because he has a guilty conscience. I love U2! I hope the Disability comes through the second time around. Good Luck! I am heading out to Sub Middle School for the next 2 days. I have been fortunate to be subbing steadily over the past 2 weeks. Subbing=Babysitting It is not really teaching, but I hope I land my own classroom in this lifetime.

January 30, 2011

I hope that you can get what you need. It is an unfair situation.