155. On fire.

Im typing on the iPad so if the language is a lil fucked up please excuse.

I don’t even know where to begin. I never though Scotty and I could ever exist this way. I am beyond in love. I really don’t understand how every day I spend is better than yesterday. It is so unreal to me the way he’s been acting I didn’t think Scotty had ever had this side in him. We talk every day now. We see each other at least for five minutes every day.

All day while he’s working and I’m working I can’t stop thinking about him I’m constantly sending him text messages that i know he will smile from. I’m constantly telling him how good he has been to me lately and how appreciated he is to me. 85% of the time I’m at a loss of words when he does what he does. I used to focus of the sex life more than anything and figured he was way too grown up for the romance that I’m interested. I never expected scotty to be romantic with me at all. He holds my hand in public he opens the door for me. He sends me texts saying he misses me. When were together we disregard our phones like it’s nothing. I don’t even look at my phone anymore when I’m with him.

The sex has gone retarded. I mean literally I didn’t think we would go this far into it. He makes me feel so special. And I know the things I tell him makes him just as happy. One touch from his huge ass hands makes my whole body on fire. We’ve been getting discounts from the first hotel he’s ever taken me. Which we split half and half and he takes care of our drugs alcohol and condoms.

It’s unbelievable I’m so happy I’m somewhat expecting us to fall apart. But I know this guy loves me he’s clearly shown me hes got it bad for me.

Last night I was irritated with him because I spent all night Friday looking for him and he fell asleep at his brothers house from eight pm to six am. I looked so hard for him and was so disappointed when he didn’t answer my phone calls. I got extremely drunk at my uncles with matthew trying to cover up my worries.

My worries have grown hugenover Scotty. He nearly went to jail in Ohio which caused him to cough up $400 to bond himself out. Ridiculous story. Oh boy.

So i figured he’d have to be in jail and there goes my head getting all twisted around with unwanted thoughts.

But yesterday he did call me and I was just so upset getting really salty with him. He explained and told me he’d see me soon. I was having a huge BBQ at my house and just wanted to leave right away to see him when i asked him if I was going to watch the UFC fights with him and the boys he told me he didn’t know. I grew so irritated thinking I wasn’t going to see him at all.

He kept telling me he misses me and he promised to see me. Then randomly he called me and told me to pick up his brother and then him from the bar. We all went to bdubs watching all the Detroit games. And the fights. As we walked in his arm was around my back. Talking about me keeping him from sleep all the time and when i do let him sleep I don’t disturb him. It felt extremely fantastic when he would sneak up behind him with his arms wrapped around me. I asked him if we had enough money to fuck. He said maybe and he covered our bill. We watched every fight and then we left. His brother decided to get a ride from Corey. So it was just us. He grabbed some liquor and we were at our room. We must’ve got there around midnight. We didn’t end up fucking until 430 in the morning. We seriously laid around talking about bullshit. It was beautiful. And when we did get freaky.. He surprised me in crazy ass ways. I never thought him and I would ever be in this puppy love position. It almost feels brand new like we just started dating.

Whatever he realized I hope he never stops acting this way. Seems like every time I tell him how happy he makes me he just keeps going stronger.. Or squeezes me tighter. I love that he’s touchy feely. I love love love love him. I’m ecstatic.

The sex.. The dates.. The romance.. The dinners.. The movies.. The hotel rooms.. The vacations.. The sleep. Everything. I am floating on a cloud. I am so in love. I hope it never goes away. Him and I are doing great. I love you all I’m off to read my bookmarks.

Love love love

-L