tedium

So today I did a little research on my ODSP vs Second Career funding dilemma that was giving me such anxiety yesterday. Of course, I couldn’t find anything specifically about Second Career and how ODSP handles/considers/deducts that funding from it’s own support – I expect the program is too new for the archaic ODSP – but I did find some info worthy of report.

When we first talked to my assigned worker about BF’s application to EI once he is officially unemployed, she snippily informed us not to expect "the government to pay us twice for the same thing," that ODSP deducts 100% of all BF’s EI income from my support cheque (usually, the deduct only 50% of his paycheques from the amount I get). So, IOW, if I am allowed to get, say, $1600 per month an BF gets $400 from EI, then I will get $1200. Basically, we will be right back where we started. Not much point of going on EI then, I thought. However, the SC counsellor has informed us that any EI amounts will not count as income we already have – meaning we will be able to request more money from SC is BF does apply for EI. I’m not sure if that made sense the way I wrote it out… but whatever. That’s not the part that bothers me since the counsellor told us it will be to our benefit on our application to apply for EI.

The part that has had me worried is how ODSP will consider the money we receive from SC. When we got our loan from the bank to buy a car and consolidate our debt they tried to disqualify me from ODSP saying that the loan was income. Excuse me? We’re $40K in debt still. We had the same amount of debt before this that we have now. We didn’t keep any of the money or use it to live on. And I could prove it will receipts and such. But they did try. Eventually, after numerous letters, they backed down. So I’ve been worried that any money from SC will be similarly received.
Also, the fact that the worker said that bit about the government not paying for the same thing twice… Well, I get about $700 from ODSP specifically for help with our housing costs (rent, utilities). SC does offer applicants in financial need assistance with living expenses such as rent. Now, when we get our own apartment in Ottawa where rent is significantly higher than here, we will need at least $300 above that $700 from ODSP to be able to have a place to stay. My fear has been that ODSP will say "gov’t doesn’t give you money twice for the same thing" and take that $300 from SC off of my ODSP cheque. *SIGH* In which case, we will not be able to sustain ourselves in Ottawa.

I have since discovered however that OSAP which, like SC, is government-funded and which also provides assistance for housing costs is exempt income. This makes me feel TREMENDOUSLY better – surely, it would be the same case for SC funds then. The only difference that leaves me wondering is repayment. SC you don’t have to pay back; OSAP you do. Still I have a large measure of hope now whereas only yesterday I was driven ill with anxiety over it.

Through my researching I have also found that BF will qualify for a $500 returning to work/school benefit to help with "start up costs". Additionally, his income for the four months leading up to the commencement of school are exempt from deduction so as to allow us to save and prepare for school This is amazing because he desperately needs some new clothes and shoes as well as a new computer to work on for his classes. The 4-month income exemption will also help tremendously as we prepare (and pay) to move. Since we are only about 2 months before school begins, we may not get reimbursed for the first 2 months of the exemption that we have missed… but even just the remaining two months will help greatly. Very greatly. I was beginning to stress about how we would pay for our loan in the purgatory between the end of BF’s paycheques and the beginning of the SC funding… 

As it is, I’m stressing about the details and logistics about which I quite literally can have no idea about yet… such as exactly what date will we move on, having to consider the availability of persons to help us load and unload on either end of the journey… such as renting the truck itself… such as where we will stay when we actually arrive there (we’re hoping to stay at my aunt’s cottage but it may be rented; otherwise, we will stay for at least a month with my mom *GASP* I love my mom but nooooooo!)… such as how are the cats going to cope on such a long journey… what items are going where… how we’re going to pay for everything and when… okay, I’ll stop now. The picture is clear I’m sure. LOL

Oh, for a money tree in my backyard!

In other news…

BF told CFMIL that we will indeed be attending the dinner at The Mandarin on Sunday instead of doing our own thing — to which she promptly replied, "Oh! Can you pick us up?" Yup. Man, that woman bugs the SHIT out of me!!!!! Nevermind the fact that someone is OBVIOUSLY picking her up already anyway, she lives 20 minutes in the opposite direction from where we are going and her place is on the way to and from all of the other guests’ houses. Also nevermind the fact that gas is over a dollar right now!! WTF lady?!?!?!! BF told her no. She thought we might like to come over before and/or after. Um, no. She really has no care or thought that we might have other plans or that we’re changing plans so that we can be there for that part of the day. It’s all about her. BF told her he’s getting together with some guys from work. A blatant lie that can be easily found out IMO – which makes me nervous. But BF isn’t bothered about it; he says he can come up with a cover story on the fly if he has to. Plans change, etc etc. IMO, if you’re gonna be a liar be a good one from the get-go. LOL I would have told her something she couldn’t possibly prove was a lie by accident. (CFBIL used to work with the guy BF said he was going out with and CFBIL also plays the same online game as that guy… so… EASY!) Anyway. It all just further solidifies my opinion that we should definitely see them next in a group so that there is no wailing and carrying on. I can tell she just wants to get him into her lair so she can torment him. It’s the way she’s always gotten what she wants. Not this time honey.

Speaking of CFBIL… the little weasel has decided that he is going to try for the SC program too. I am having a hard time not being overly evil and irritated about this. I am hoping the distance (WHICH IS SOON TO COME!!!!!!) will enable me to be indifferent when the crazies do selfish things… Yeah, he’s entitled to apply since technically he qualifies. Yes, he deserves to make a better life for himself. Yes, yes, blah, blah. It’s just that the little bugger has gotten everything handed to him on a frickin platter thus far. He went away to school for university and not only did he flunk out but he wasn’t able to support himself so that his family, barely able to support themselves, sent him way more money than they could afford to make him "happy" because he was "so depressed". So, he came home and subsequently defaulted on all his student loans.

Now, BF and I got a co-signer and a $20K loan (years ago) to pay off all BF’s student debts. We took the adult approach and BF actually worked to pay off his obligations – and by worked I mean actually went to work. Not like CFBIL who stays home if he has a hangnail and who was on his second written notice for attendance (meaning he’d missed over 11 days – not including the FIVE he got off as an unpaid leave) at work in MARCH before he was laid off. Anyway, so BF did the adult thing to deal with his obligations – CFBIL goes the shrink and cries and whines about being so poor and the shrink writes a letter to the gov’t and GETS HIS STUDENT LOANS FORGIVEN — 100% gone!! No more obligation!!! Just like THAT!!!

It just irritates me. We work hard for what we get and the crazies just whine about it until someone fixes it for them – until they get whatever it is that they need to rescue them this time. The TV that BF and I bought them less than FOUR years ago when he dad was dying was "beginning to die" – nevermind the fact that it is only 4 years old and we have had the SAME model for 10 years, nevermind that they haven’t paid us back the half that they said they would pay us for. They whined long enough about it that someone in the family just up and gave them a 27" tv. For free.

It astounds me. CFBIL needed special contact lenses because he has had a detached retina and his eyesight was declining in the one eye, blah blah. He was told if he didn’t get these lenses he could go blind. They were about $400 though. That was at least a year ago. I thought they had taken care of it seeing as how there are numerous local associations that assist with eye glass money – the lions club, Ontario Works emergency assistance. Nope. He went back recently and his eyesight is really really bad apparently because he never did get the contacts. So now they’ve borrowed $400 from an aunt and uncle (who is dying of prostate cancer as we speak) in order to pay for them. WTF not get off your ass and find out what can be done on your OWN instead of waiting for someone to fix it for you!!!?!?!??! OMG BAH!!!! At least it’s not BF anymore, that’s all I can say. We’ve cured them of that expectation.

Anyway, so it annoys the piss out of me that the little bugger is trying to copy BF about this SC stuff and just might get MORE schooling for free. FVCK THAT. He does not deserve it!!!!! Why can’t he just let BF have something of HIS OWN?! BF quit university the first time to provide financially for his family when his dad went looney tunes (no matter what his fvcked in the head mother says about it "what are you talking about? you flunked out") Stupid bitch. Anyway, I hope CFBIL doesn’t get it. I had to say that out loud. I hope he doesn’t get it. Of course, in reality, I hope that he gets his act together, gets his own place and grows up. In reality, though, none of it will ever happen. In order to graduate he would need to get to class. He’s already proven he can’t do that – by flunking out the first time, by getting fired for attendance once (almost twice). And in order to actually get the funding he’d have to get off his ass to do the research — which is no small feat. BF handed in a package that was over an inch thick, no joke. My printer still aches at the thought… LOL He can’t even be bothered to look for work. He was actually offered a position back at his old place of employment but he "hasn’t responded yet". CFMIL  actually said to BF that CFBIL will likely just wait until his EI is up and then find a job. She actually thought BF would do the same and was surprised that he wasn’t. Wow… it just staggers me sometimes.

Yeah, I’m not looking forward to dinner on Sunday but at least it will be one of the last ones. *GRIN*

Today I’m grateful for…

* the fact that I learned to spell grateful properly!!! 

* ONLY TWO MORE MONTHS!!!!!!! I’m going to make a counter I think… LOL

* the $500 available to BF to help him get ready to go back to school… if in fact we get it – but I’m hopeful!!

* the information I found out about OSAP which lessens my anxiety over how ODSP will consider our SC funding

* the fact that we had money to buy a fair amount of groceries this paycheque!!!

* my friend A who has been such a good one while we’ve lived here, helping to take care of my cats when we go away and being understanding of my weird anxieties and just being enthusiastic without being pushy – I am going to miss her, and her little kiddies too

* a BF who is not afraid to communicate about feelings and perceptions and who is uniquely self-aware and understanding… <3