today was yuck

so the guy i was hanging out with for the last year posted on facebook that he has a girlfriend now.  it shocked me.  i’m still feeling upset about it.  i don’t know why.  i can focus my energy on kevin now (who i what i really want) but i guess after a year, i figured if he wanted a girlfriend, he would choose me.  she is in north carolina so its going to be a long distance relationship so i’m not sure how that will work but whatever.  i need some happy.  i went to the gym and felt better after but now i feel grumpy again.  i talked to a friend and she pointed out how scummy he was for doing that.  it really was a jerk move and i don’t want someone like that.  so its a good thing.  but i’ve had a lot of these kind of shocks.  kind of like when the asshole mike told me he was engaged.  its hard when you care for someone and have shared a bed with them, to just push those feelings aside.  but, i need to focus on the good things about kevin.  lets make a list 🙂

he is:

funny
kind
thoughtful
hot (super duper hot!)
sweet
hard worker
great father
responsible
hot (this needs to go on the list twice lol)
generous

those are all i can think of right now.  my mind is still boggled.  but, this can be a good thing.  i am ready to move on to someone who cares about me and has told me he loved me twice and proposed 4 times lol.  the love and the proposals were in jest but they are nice to hear 🙂  i just wish i could see him more often.  i need some patience, bad!