Can’t Stand-ing Issues

 It’s rare that I can’t stand somebody, but there’s a guy in our office I really dislike. I used to think he was a pretty good guy, but over the past year, Yas he has gotten successful, he has become a complete ass and I find myself inadvertently wishing ill upon him. 
 
It’s starts out as an unconscious thing, like he’ll be all freaked out and yelling at or about something or somebody (not at me, I don’t work for him) and I’ll think, "Some day he’s going to have heart attack.  Then he’ll realize what’s really important in life."  And I picture him in a hospital bed regretting these red-faced moments then realize the quasi-satisfaction I’m getting from my imaginings as opposed to my usual, genuine, concern for people. 
 
Or, yesterday, he had a bag with two 7-11 donuts on his desk, as he often does, because he eats tons of crap, and I found myself thinking, "He’s already a little plump. If he keeps eating like that, he’s going to be really obese when he gets past his 30s.". And my mind’s eye pictured him huffing and puffing as he waddles to his office and, again, I realized that, inside, I was being this old biddie, shaking my head and feeling very satisfied and pleased at the thought that this terrible prediction might come true and serve him right. 
 
So I’m trying to pray for him. This doesn’t happen to me very often at all, but when I pray for somebody I can’t stand, it always feels like something brittle in me is breaking – not necessarily a good feeling at all and since I’ve been having faith issues of late, it is quite trying. </p>