The Cardinal in the Street

On the way to church this morning I passed an intersection and there
was this beautiful cardinal (as in red bird, not as in religious
figure) standing in the road. He was gorgeous but just stood there. I
assumed he would take off flying any minute as there was a little bit
of traffic out even though it was early, but he didn’t go anywhere so I
began to wonder if he were crippled or maimed or something. I wondered
if I should pull over or turn back and try to scoop him up and “save”
him. At this rate he might end up mowed down. But, I thought, I didn’t
really know exactly how to pick him up. I didn’t have gloves on. I
supposed I could somehow wrap him in my coat and maybe call animal
patrol. I really was at a loss so I just kept on driving, feeling a bit
guilty. I considered calling my husband (I was on my way to church – I
always go earlier than the rest of the family because I’m in choir) but
I didn’t know what my husband could do, so I didn’t call him.

I
felt ill at ease over leaving this remarkable bird sitting in the
intersection. He looked confused, pathetic, so alone. And he was such a
brilliant shade of red. I was afraid that he’d be condemned to death
because of me, and that bothered me terribly, but I wasn’t sure what to
do. Then it occurred to me that I wouldn’t have cared nearly so much
had it have been one of those plain gray birds of which we seem to have
hundreds everywhere. They’re unremarkable and not terribly lovely… just
one of the crowd. If one of those guys had been standing in the
intersection I may have shooed them on, but I certainly wouldn’t have
been feeling guilty or moved to return to the spot and rescue them. Why
is that? I wondered and realized that it has to do with the beauty… the
rare beauty of the cardinal. And I became quite aware of why it was so
important to me to have had that weight loss surgery. I put such a
tremendous value upon physical attractiveness to the point where I
obviously feel the physically attractive are even entitled to live over
the physically unattractive. That revelation really stunned me.

(Forgive any typos or if that didn’t entirely make sense. I’m half-asleep as I’m writing this. Good night!)