I don’t know how to love someone else

How does someone forget the person they are sure was their soulmate? How many years does it take to let go? To find someone new and not stop seeing his face in my mind all the time? I was sure that after 6 years I was “over him”. In many ways I am, I don’t feel pain or sorrow or get upset when I see him and my ex friemd with their daughter at my friends house. Yes he is with my ex friend who happens to be related to my kids…If you want the long story read my entire diary from day 1.

I feel that I have repelled all men around me , not my means of my own offcourse but the aura I send out..I guess?

This man was all I ever needed (I thaught back then) even if we had a destructive relationship for 11 years I loved him (or hated) that I took all the crap and abuse he threw at me. My friends tell me how unhappy he is and that he never wanted the kid (they are both 45) she is 1 year old.

I can feel his presence in my life and mind all the time. I want to let go all the way and I was sure I had but the fact that no man shows up beside me is just the proof I need to know something is out of wack. How do you love someone else? Where do I begin? Maybe loving myself more and thus attract the ONE? Life is such a beautiful playground with no rules or guidelines we find the answeres as we go along this highway called life…