Outlines of underwear

I broke out the boots today. I haven’t worn these puppies since February. But it feels oh-so-good.

I had really sharp pains in my stomach yesterday. I hope it’s not an alien baby. If it is, I will not name it Renesmee. Or Karenary, a mix of Karen (mom) and Mary (stepmom). Oh and also? That fucking Breaking Dawn movie SUCKED. I swear, the only person that can actually act in that shit is Kristin Stewart, and I think even she dumbs herself down because Bella is such a stupid, personality-less anticharacter. Robert Pattinson is like a Ken doll who just sits there and stares blankly and has no real genitalia, just an outline of underwear.

Christmas is coming up and I’m concerned about my present buying. Why does it have to be so stressful? I wish I could sit in front of a computer and click-click-click BUY, but no. First of all, I think that’s a little thoughtless. We’re all just drones who sit in front of our computers all day and can’t even walk outside to go shopping in a store with other human beings. Granted, shopping can suck a big fat one, but only if you go to the crap stores. I plan on going to this Indian store up the street and buying little knick-knacks. The term implies ‘cheap’ which is exactly what I am.

Last night was supposed to be wine bar night with the girls for Mandy’s THIRD birthday celebration, but instead, I skipped out early. Blamed it on the alien baby. I’m not sure what the deal is with people having multiple birthday parties… seems a bit self-involved for my taste. I feel weird even having one big birthday party, all eyes on me, everyone coming to celebrate my life (OH WHATEVER I love it), but three? And having some of the same people at all of them? Get over yourself.

I don’t think I learned anything during NoJoMo. Except more about some of my faves that don’t write as often. I still don’t know the point. It was a pointless challenge but I still took it, and got 29/30, which is 96%. A for effort.

There is enough tea running through my body in any given day to sustain a small village in Africa. Maybe I should donate my tea bags to them. The only dilemma in this is that 1/3 of the tea I drink in a day is natural laxative tea, which would really defeat the purpose for the African children. I would be contributing to famine.

Last night, I completely zoned out on weed. It was glorious. Not worrying about anything or anyone and just BEING and turning off my mind to all the troubles in my life. Which there are some… mostly money-related. Christmas is always a tight time of year. My pay was docked $400 because of my flu days…. not exactly the best time of year for THAT to happen.

I sent my parents my christmas list. Before you get all “Christmas is about giving, not getting!” on me, you should know that my mom prefers a list, and my dad was going to get me yet another chef’s knife because he never knows what else to get me. So feast your eyes on this masterpiece:

Queen – Greatest Hits

Watch – a nice one 🙂 Like yours, mom. But doesn’t need to be spendy. Gold color.

Weighted keyboard, just like Mandy’s but NOT MANDY’S …..

Forever 21 or H&M gift cards

Candles, vanilla/sweet smelling

Cutting board, plastic or bamboo

CD player, cheap-o

iPad =P

Car detail (okay now I’m grasping at straws here)

OMG my car needs to be detailed so bad. If I’m still on a roll after cleaning the apartments after work today, I’m going to go to town on my car. The poor thing is a mess. I have a 1/2 full 40oz of Bud Light (WHO AM I?!) from late September kickin’ around in the back seat, plus clothes I’ve probably forgotten I own, and my dash has dust galore. For being a relatively new car (2009), it sure has some work that needs to be done to it on the inside. Poor baby.

I’ve never named my car. I should get on that. It sort of reminds me of a diamond. …. Hope? Like the Hope Diamond? or… Blood. Like Blood diamond. I’d say Marquis but I hate marquis cut diamonds.

I should really end this entry. SAYONARA NOJOMO