Copycat

I’ve been relatively sick since Friday night. The downward kind of sick. Like food poisoning. I can’t seem to keep anything in my stomach longer than 20 minutes. It’s almost like clockwork. For about a year, I’ve been drinking Senna tea daily, which is a natural laxative. I’m wondering if that’s fucking up my intestines. Before you say “YEAH duh that’s totally it….” it probably isn’t. Because this stuff is safe to drink every day and I’ve never had this happen in the year or so that I’ve been drinking the stuff. However, I’m not going to drink it for a couple days just to see if it calms everything down.

Bonus to this sort of sickness…. losing weight. We’ll see if that happens. Once I had salmonella and I lost 15 pounds! I wasn’t eating and was shitting my insides out for 2 weeks, so that’s how that happened. I’m not sure it was worth it, because food poisoning is super lame.

My TMI entries are like the worst kind of TMI. Yeast infections, vaginitis and diarrhea. Go Becky.

So it’s dark already and I haven’t left work yet. This is sad. This means I HAVE to go on adventures on my lunch breaks because that’s the only daylight I’ll see except for the 20 minute drive to work in the morning. Plus, the rain is starting…. and once it starts, it rarely stops ’round these parts. At least that’s what they say.

Tomorrow is my mom’s birthday and I haven’t gotten her anything. I did, however, drop $230 on Forever 21 merch yesterday, on myself. So that’s cool. Plus, I’m getting a facial on Friday which is $100. This is what happens at the beginning of the month, I spend spend spend, then use my credit card at the end of the month and then cash my check for the cleaning job. Gets me by until the next paycheck.

I’m sure that was interesting to read. Not.

I have no idea what to get my mom for her birthday.

I was going to record a song for her, or a few songs, but there was no time to prepare. I don’t have ANY equipment for such a venture, and have no idea where to even begin. I do know, however, that I have a voice recorder on my iphone…. I’ve recorded myself singing a couple songs and I feel confident enough to be put on a CD. So let’s get this moving. Bieber, watch out, my Christmas album will be more awesome than yours.

I mentioned to my family that I wanted/needed a vacation so I was planning a trip to Hawaii. I made it a February trip because it’s after the stressful holidays and I’ll have had at least 3 months of gloomy weather, so it made sense. Well, I found out two weeks ago, my sister has a Hawaii trip planned. She left yesterday and is there for 6 days. I’m like, hmmmm that sounds familiar…. someone’s a copycat. I’m just saying. It was my idea first.

I am overly confident and sure of myself but also humble and personable…. so I’m not really sure why things aren’t coming together for me, in the DUDES area. I mean, DUDE. WTF. I’ve been single for nearly a year. A fucking year! I haven’t been single this long in, well…. since I had my first boyfriend. I’m not sure what the deal is. I walk the line of being a hard ass when I’m out by myself, because us single chicks have to protect ourselves against the gangsters, and trying to be open-minded and friendly. WHATEVER. Fuck.

I had a massive salad for lunch, as per usual, and while chewing broccoli I unexpectedly sneezed really hard. Bam, broccoli everywhere. Like, in my hair. On my sleeve, on my keyboard. Luckily none of it went up my nose.

I may get a bottle of wine tonight. $2.49 bottles at Trader Joe’s…. how fucking enabling is that mother fucker Joe?!