Pandora

Two posts in one day! The last one was getting a little long, so I decided to break it up. This one is more interesting, anyway. Well, if you’re me. I don’t know how you all feel about it.

I have been listening to a lot of Pandora recently. When I cook dinner, I like to dance (badly) in the kitchen to good music. I was getting sick of the songs I own, so I decided to make a new Pandora station: high-energy, fun songs I can sing along with.

My artist seeds are KT Tunstall, Regina Spektor, and She & Him. Apparently I like chick-rock with a twist of slightly crazy. All of my song seeds are up-tempo, catchy little numbers.

This is my conversation with Pandora:

Me: Okay, KT Tunstall radio, go!
Pandora: “Are you strong enough to be my man?”
Me: That’s… not exactly what I had in mind. Thumbs down!
Pandora: “But the landslide brought you doooown.”
Me: *shudder* Thumbs down!
Pandora: “I don’t mind spending every day out on the corner in the pouring rain!”
Me: Okay, technically up-tempo, but not really what I’m looking for. Maybe if I give you some seed songs. Let’s see… “Mushaboom”? “On the Radio”? “Black Horse and the Cherry Tree”? These giving you any ideas?
Pandora: “Red, red wiiiiiiine! Stay close to meeeeee!”
Me: What? No!
Pandora: Haaaah! Haaaah! You cannot skip anymore songs. “Red red wine you make me feel so fine you keep me rocking all of the time…”
Me: MUTE!

*three minutes later*

Me: UNMUTE!
Pandora: “Red, red wiiiiiiine! Go to my heeeeead!”
Me: If I don’t like it when UB40 sings it, do you think I’ll change my mind just because Bob Marley does?
Pandora: “Red, red wiiiiiiine! Stay close to meeeeee!”
Me: Unlike!
Pandora: “Buffalo soldier, dreadlock rasta…”
Me: I don’t think you understand. I don’t like Bob Marley, either. Yes, I’m the only person in America who doesn’t like Bob Marley. I also dislike the Beatles. Stop looking at me like that. Bob Marley doesn’t make the dishes get clean any faster. Bob Marley makes me want to be deaf.
Pandora: “You may say I’m a dreamer! But I’m not the only one! I hope somedaaaay you’ll join us!”
Me: Remember how I said I didn’t like the Beatles? That includes John Lennon. Okay, up-tempo, catchy, go!
Pandora: “Words like violence break the silence…”
Me: Are you kidding me.
Pandora: “I love you, you love me! We’re a happy fa-mi-ly!”
Me: Now I know you’re messing with me on purpose.
Pandora: “With a great big hug and kiss from me to you!”
Me: I’ll give you a great big hug. With this KNIFE.
Pandora: “Won’t you say you love me too?”
Me: That’s it. You’re going in the oven.

Don’t forget. New blog.

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