Time flies when… errr… time flies?

OK. So…. I’ve been delinquent…absent…tardy, a commitment phobe. I’m not sure why I wasn’t writing, I just remember that I had another deflation moment where inspiration wasn’t forthcoming so I chucked it in. Still, I like that OD is always here when I come back. I’ve resolved to spend time writing in here because I think a chronical is a good thing, especially when the husband is deployed.

So I’m here. SItting in my P.J’s on a sunny Tuesday morning, wrestling with the fact that the bank account is low, pay day isn’t for another effing 12 days and Sacha’s birthday is Sunday. Being that she’s turning 8, suddenly all her wishes a desires have upped the ante and I don’t think there is much on her list below $100 bucks. Suckers. To add to my woes, I was invited to take a roadtrip to New Mexico this week-end for a roller derby bout and it’s looking like my dismal financial standing will prevent that too.

Donations? LOL.

It would have been great because I need a distraction. I always knew that the first couple of weeks would be slow, tough and really blah. I just don’t know that I was ready for it all. I think i’d avoided coming to terms with his departure so much so that on the day everything just felt so surreal. We said goodbye and he was gone. I went home and sat… my brain trying to trick me that he’d walk back in the door any moment. Nope.

He’s been gone since Thursday and it feels like it’s already been a month. I can’t remember how I dealt with the time when we were apart but I guess work helped that somewhat. Not having that routine distraction (and the money!) is quite frustrating.

If your instinct is to ask about any of the details, don’t. Easier that way. I’ll be able to work when I’m able to work. In the meantime I’m struggling to get used to this stay-at-home-mum crap. I love my kids but I miss work. They’ve been off school since May 20th and they start back in two weeks. I’m not gonna lie… The mere idea of them going back makes me rejoice.

Back to deployment stuff.

So… Jimmy flew Thursday and is currently stuck in Kyrgystan waiting on an Air Force plane to fly him (and about 600 others) into Afghanistan. The flight has been cancelled several times due to a malfunctioning plane and I think he’s going out of his brain being stuck there. There’s nothing to do and he’s frustrated that he’s not where he’s supposed to be. I guess I’m frustrated for him too. I’m hoping that once he’s there and starts with the mountain of work his XO will hand him, that we’ll both be able to settle into a routine.

Once I get into a routine (which will now consist of having the time to go to the gym everyday!!!! YAYYYY!!!) I’m sure things will start to settle down. Right now I feel a bit numb and I can’t quite explain that… It’s part lonliness, part frustration, part empowerment (in a very odd way). The main thing is that I’m coping and I wasn’t sure just how well I’d cope until I got to this point but I’ve suprised myself.

So that’s the 411.

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