i can sing the tune, just not the words

i, yet again, did not have the first baby of the year………which is probably a good thing this time, since i’m not due until mid february…

my new year began quite boringly… is that a word?….with me sleeping alone by 8:30pm. our friends were supposed to come over, but with the freezing rain all afternoon, they thought it best to stay home–which i don’t really blame them, but i was pretty excited to actually be doing something besides sitting home with the fam. like every weekend night. granted we were only to go down the block to her parents house, it still would have been nice to be able to talk to someone IN PERSON besides my coworkers… since my husband doesn’t talk.  i’m sick of emailing everyone everything, that is the only way i ever get to talk to anyone.

 

and i still want to work a transcription job? yeah….

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bear’s first christmas went well, we only got a few annoying toys, and hopefully the batteries will die soon…i will admit i am a proud parent and really wanted to show him off to everyone. of course they all thought him adorable. and being the only grandkid in joe’s family, he got the share of the attention.

but as always, christmas is  a letdown. you plan and pick the perfect gifts, then it’s over in one day, and you’re left with a bunch of crap you have to find a place for. or take it back. or give it away… or regift.

this year i did get nearly everything i asked for though. i was very impressed with my husband. he listened. and bought what i wanted, not what he thought i would want.

and i bought him nothing that he wanted…. i had no motivation. i had no ideas, and the only thing i did think of, was $350 and i couldn’t really afford it… plus i didn’t really have any time to get it once i thought of it. —-remote car starter system.

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my preggoness is a day by day thing. some days i feel great, some i’m so uncomfortable that i want to just lay down. at work i sit on my ass all day, and some days i just stand next to my desk, cuz i’m too uncomfortable to sit anymore.

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work…..i’m still technically a float. i have been in the same department for the last 4 months though, and now, starting monday, i have to move to a different department, with a different boss, with different coworkers, and actually pretend to know what i’m doing. the more i think about it, the more i hate being a secretary. i want to be a transcriptionist, but those jobs are few and far between, and the ones i have applied for have turned me down…. i really thought i would get the one i applied for a few weeks ago. it looked promising. i was 1 of 7 to be interviewed for 2 positions. but i think the fact that i’m preggo and due in 7 weeks had something to do with it. *now 6 weeks*… they wanted to train 2 people for 8 weeks, and at most, i would have about 5 weeks to train. not really what they were looking for… but i thought i nailed the interview, they just weren’t looking for a pregnant lady—but they of course can’t say that. they just said "we’ve found someone else"…. and i’m starting to think that i suck, since i’ve applied for atleast 9 different jobs (which i’m supposed to do) and interviewed for 4, with not one single offer….i really didn’t want any of the secretary positions that i applied for, so i’m not too sad about those (but i did find out that 2 of the 3 secy postions i interviewed for went to 2 BRAND NEW secretaries that started in december. yeah, way to make me feel good about my skills)……….. uggh/

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i don’t know what else. the weather has been cold, but the ground is covered in snow, which makes me exteremly happy… i was sick of the "brown" christmas’ like the last 5 years…. when i was still in high school i was raking leaves on christmas eve. that DOES NOT HAPPEN in minnesota (snowta)……i wish baby was old enough to go outside and play in the snow… the other day we had perfect weather and snow for a snowman, but he doesn’t have any snow pants and it was too cold for him to be out–at nearly 1 year—so i have to sacrifice my snow man building for another year—-but i probably can’t bend well enough to be out in the snow anyway… i can barely walk half the time.

 

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bear will be one in 5 days. i’m in awe at how short of a time this year has been. it was only a year ago that i was in horrible horrible pain and waiting to have the best gift of my life delivered to me…. starting to sapp it up, but i STILL can’t believe that something like this could change your life so much. i knew i wouldn’t have the same life, but i have a completely different life. i’m older, wiser, more sensitive to everything (but that could be the fact that i’m pregnant….again). i’m just ready for my life to begin. i, for once, feel right. feel like everything is where it’s supposed to be.

we’re taking him to the mall of america for his birthday. i don’t think he’ll care either way as to where we go, but i wanted to get away from here, buy him something nice for his birthday, and let him go crazy with some food that we’ll over pay for but he’ll make a huge mess, so i won’t really care—plus i don’t know anyone in the cities. and i wanted it to just be us.

he’s having 2 birthday parties. one tomorrow, one next saturday. i didn’t want the ENTIRE family in our house, plus with all the snow, there is no place to park. so we’re having a seperate party for each side. it’s not really ideal, and i wish we could have just sucked it up and had one party, but i’ll get over it, and bear won’t care either way. he’ll have 2 cakes, so he’ll be happy with it all.

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and with that, i wish the world a happy new year, and hope that this year will be as great as the last. i have a feeling that 2011 will be the best year yet.

my son turns one, my daughter is born. my brother turns 18 and graduates high school. my sister turns 16 and gets her license…which may not be a good thing?….my best friend will have her 2nd baby. i will be able to drink in july–for my birthday, and tubing and parties. and i’ll still be a mom. which is by far the best part of the year. i love my baby, and soon to be babies.