platforms

I have been sick.

Blah.

Brilliant fun!

Sleep has been nearly impossible. I have been leaving lights on in my room at night. I’m not really afraid of the dark, but more so afraid of what I have seen in the dark. Lights make the things more faint.

Mondays therapy was another waste. I had nothing to say. I was too exhausted. My brain was gray. Counselor let me know. She got on me about self care….as in, ‘try getting more sleep.’ I thought that was a great suggestion…for a person who is actually able to sleep. I would love more than anything to be able to practice better self care.

I would love to be a bear, they seem to know how to practice self care. Perhaps I should seek help from a bear. I wouldn’t eat their porridge, or break any of their chairs, but I would be quite grateful to have use of one of their beds for a while.

This week is dragging on. It’s already how many days into december? I almost forgot my sisters birthday. And whats all that crap I have been hearing about the holidays?

I hate cold weather. It makes me feel angry.

Aside from all of that complaining, I don’t have a damn thing going on right now.

I am still amused with Francois…well, because I don’t have a life.

I did go to Nola again to listen to some music. It was nice, and Carrol was there like always. She too, amuses me. She wears light up shoes, like the ones for children. I don’t blame her, I can’t say that I wouldn’t wear light up shoes. They look cool when they are on dancing feet.

Oh, I saw Wee-Man the other day (aka Jason Acuna…I had to google it) He is a guy from those horribily awful Jackass movies. I was scarred for life from watching just one short scene in one of the Jackass movies. I will now forever associate any Jackass movie with that particular scene, therefor, I will never ever watch one…ever, not even if i know that it will not be similar to the one. Paper cuts….thats all I have to say about the scene…even mentioning it nearly sends me into a meltdown. Anyway…Wee-Man, he was just walking with someone down the street. Or actually, my friend(and her dog) and I walked past him while he was coming out of a little italian market place. Then Wee-Man saw my friends adorable dog wearing a tacky christmas sweater, and he thought it was cute….which it was. So theres that, at least Wee-Man and I have something in common, he may be the one that likes evil life scarring movies, however we both like animal clothes…or at least I think he likes animal clothes. Maybe I should mail him a letter asking if its true.

Dear Wee-Man,

Just the other day I noticed you appreciated dog sweaters. But please, tell me if this is a true fact. I must know. I want us to have something in common. What else do you like. Please say lava lamps, raincoats, and poodles named Margot. Write back ASAP!

Sincerly,

Your sidewalk companion.

WOW!

That was very dumb!

Its the next day, forgive me for the above!

I felt a bit better today, which has been nice.

I was just digging through a bunch of old junk….just for the sake of junk digging….its fun every once in a while…anyway, I came across an old program flier line-up thingy for and old music festival I used to go to. I was looking through the bands that played and I am rather ashamed of myself for not being able to remember most of the bands that played there….for ex: New Found Glory, SR-71, Coldplay, Lifehouse, Fuel, 3 Doors Down, Tenacious D, Incubus, Live, American Hi-Fi, Alien Ant Farm, Good Charlotte, Lincoln Park, Fatboy Slim, Mike D and Mixmaster Mike, Sum 41, The Offspring, NOFX…this just naming a few, and….and……..The Cure! Damnit,  I have to say, many of these bands are not my favorite but still….I was a stupid teenager. So knowing this now, I will make it a point to be sober whenever I go to a music festival or show in the future. Because live music is way too unbelievably beautiful, and I am not willing to forget anymore of it! I have even realized this with the live local music I have been listining to as of recently!!!!

I want to go to a concert, I feel like I havn’t been to one in a very long time. The local stuff is great, I’m so greatful for it, but I’m craving that concert atmosphere! I have been checking tours, but nothing has stood out yet. I think Radiohead came around, but the damn tickets were too expensive, and I think there was or is going to be a smashing pumpkins concert near by, or maybe that was another band..I don’t remember…It was an S band I think…or perhaps my mind has just been stuck in the 90s grunge phase…anyway…Iive music. Thats my point in all of this.

Oh…No Doubt, I remember that one, that was a good show. I wanted to be Gwen Stefani! I remember being about 4ft away from her and hoping she would reach out and touch me with a magical Gwen Stefani touch that would turn me into a cool girl like herself. Spiderwebs! Thats where its at. "So Leave a message and I’ll call you back!"

Damn you Gwen! I also wanted to be Scary Spice. Her hair was the best, nevermind the fact that my hair was blonde and straight as a board, I wanted hers!!! I did buy..welll my mom bought me I should say, a pair of Spice Girl style shoes when I was in middle school. It was back when Sketchers were the shit. These Sketchers had a big platform similar to the platforms on the famous Spice Girl shoes. The  Sketcher platforms were pretty scaled down compared to the real deal platforms, which I’m thankful for now because if they had been as tall as the Spice Girl ones, I’m sure I would have had to have several surgeries on my ankles due to all the breaks I endured while wearing them. My shoes were yellow of course, and I thought they were so cool. Then one day I wore them to school and I got teased for wearing them. I stopped wearing them in public after that, so I became a closet platform shoe wearer. haha! But perhaps the kids were jelous of my bold shoe statement, maybe they wanted to have a pair too, but they weren’t brave enough to buy them.  

…They were like the black and white ones on the bottom left….but yellow….and cooler!

I wish I knew whear those badboys went. Im greiving the loss. I hope they are having a wonderful tease free time up in shoe heaven, where all shoes are accepted.

Francois picked this box as his preferred napping spot. He digs this box….and this box only.

Its his box and he can sleep as he wasnts to! You can sleep how you want to too, if it happens to you.