One of the Lucky Ones
"No one can make you feel inferior without your consent." – Eleanor Roosevelt
I was born with Cerebral Palsy and today is the first time I have ever done any research on the condition.
WebMD defines Cerebral Palsy as, A group of motor problems and physical disorders related to a brain injury. CP causes uncontrolled reflex movements and muscle tightness (spasticity) that may affect a part, a side, or the entire body, with varying severity.
The site goes on to state that, Cerebral palsy is caused by a brain injury or problem that occurs during fetal growth, birth, or within the first 2 to 3 years of life. CP can result from:
-Complications related to prematurity.
-Being deprived of blood, oxygen, or other nutrients before or during birth.
-A serious head injury.
-Developing a serious infection that can affect the brain.
-Some conditions that are passed from parent to child (genetic conditions) that are
-linked to abnormal brain development.
All these years, I’ve described it simply as, a neurological disease. I don’t know what it affects and what other issues it might cause because I never bothered to ask. All I know is that it causes me to walk funny and my right hand doesn’t quite work as well as the left.
I’m one of the lucky ones.
From about age five to age 18, I made annual or bi-annual trips to the Shriner’s Childrens Hospital in San Francisco. During every car ride to the Bay Area, my stomach was in knots as I expected the worst. Most of the time, it was all for nothing. My examinations didn’t last longer than 10 minutes and the doctors were always pleased by my progress.
I was making progress. Other kids weren’t so fortunate.
Every trip to that hospital gave me images I will never forget. There were children both older and younger than me that could not stand, walk, or talk. They could not dress themselves or feed themselves. In many cases, their limbs were severely deformed. They would never lead normal lives.
Lives like mine.
My parents told me–and I told myself–very early on that self-pity was not an option. There would be no feeling sorry for myself. I was one of the lucky ones.
It was a message I took to heart. At every opportunity, I did whatever I could to prove that I was just like other kids. That wasn’t always easy, but it could have been much harder.
The fact is, as much as I tried to ignore it, I was different. During my early childhood, I was weighted down by leg braces. Later, the braces came off, but I was still slower, less agile, and less athletic than everyone else. Being picked last, being stared at, and in some cases, being laughed at, was part of the territory.
Sometimes, I was picked on and bullied. I lost count of the number of times I was literally knocked down, simply because stronger kids knew I was unable to do anything about it
Throughout it all though, I was never alone. Throughout it all, I always had people in my corner.
In fact, for every one person that stared and laughed, there always seemed to be two or three that had my back when I was too weak to defend myself. When I finally was able to get back at those who tormented me, those people told me that it didn’t matter. They taught me to focus my energy on more positive, productive things. They treated me as an equal.
Those people, along with the kids I saw at the Shriner’s hospital, taught me everything I would ever need to know about the importance of treating people with respect, and accepting their differences instead of looking down on them.
I could sit here and write about how each persons differences make them unique and how we should embrace them and learn from them rather than use them as excuses to divide us as people but everyone already knows those clichés.
For me, it isn’t so general. I also learned to let people to be who they are. I was blessed with people that were sources of constant encouragement, people that were positive forces in my life. As difficult as things were sometimes, I always had those that never told me what I couldn’t do and instead told me that I was just as able and worth just as much as the next guy.
Because of those people, I am a better, stronger person today. I live my life now hoping–trying–to be those things for the people that I love.
It’s the least I can do. After all, I’m one of the lucky ones.