Remember why

Im sorry for not being what you hoped i would be

Im sorry i worry, get bitchy, and cry

Im sorry things didnt turn out the way you hoped

I wasn’t as fun easy going and cool

I didn’t just get up and break the rules

But I cry because i care so much

Get bitchy because I work so hard

Worry because of how much things mean to me

Not as fun because I’m tryin to go somewheres

I may have been clingy because i love you

I may have been jealous because you hurt me

Deep wounds are harder to recover

Just means i really loved you

I wish we could have drank more

I wish we could’ve explored

I got things I gota do

Work hard in school

Struggle with money

Raise two beautiful girls

I thought I was good for you

How can you go back to the other girls

They cheated, and did not care

Hurt you

Just remember that when you are off having so much fun with a girl who has a man and didnt care that you had a girl

the things I actually would do

We worked so hard for what

I understand why you couldnt take it

Just know why i do the things i do

And you should feel lucky to have spent some of your life with me

Yes, theres better girls than me

but we found eachother

Remember, through all this

we did drink, we did joke, we did have lots of fun

But im more than that

Dont forget all the other things i do

We might not ever be like we used to

But when you talk down about me it doesnt feel good

I take most of the blame

Even though all i ever did was try to do what was right

I was still wrong

So dont be mad at me

I did not know

I just wish you still loved me

Just please dont forget why i am the way that i am

Maybe you will miss me 

Maybe you will diss me

But just plz

Dont forget how much i really love you 

I gota say, it hurts to be dumped for trying

I will still accomplish my goals without you

May never see you

Still, it hardly seems worth doing without you

Those other girls might be fun

They might make you laugh and smile

It’s just they both have boyfriends

and didnt care that you have a girlfriend

I know we put this in the past long ago

But now that we end

and they are back in your life

i feel like you think they are better than me

and it makes me sad 🙁

I could understand if you just wanted fun

But i wasnt that bad

I wish things were different

I dont think i like love anymore if this is what its like when it ends

It lasts forever for some

But not that special someone that made might heart shine brighter than it ever did before when i was in love

I thought you were THE ONE

Maybe you are the one for me

but im not for you

so you will move on and i’ll always miss you

No…i dono if thats true

I might move on

I might be happy

in time

The truth is…i dont wana fall in love with someone else even if i was more happy

All i want is you

So…moving on won’t be by choice

But it’s what i might have to do

Sorry I cant give up yet

nope…not this time…not on you

It might be bad

But you know i’d do anything for you

So i’ll let you leave…and hope you will come back

You were better than anything i ever dreamed

Sometimes lately i just think FUCK LOVE

but hey, i dont mean that

everything takes time

but GODAMN….

If you asked me honestly

NO …I AM NOT FINE

I keep busy to stay strong

I still cry

I can’t eat even though i try

I really wish you were still mine

I miss your smile and your nice eyes

I miss the way you cared

I miss you holding me

The worst part about it

now that im the most weak

your the only one who will make me feel better

and wipe my tears

and make it ok again

It feels like irony.

Anyways…I usually stop writing when i feel alright

Or when i find a summery

This time there is none

I cant put in words how my body feels like screaming

When my head feels like its bleeding

When i punch my desk at school

What my heart is going through

Just like how when we were happy i said i cant express how much i love you

Well….

No matter what

I’m a big girl

I’ll be fine

Just that..for once in my life

I was happy for the first time

Well…not like im not used to bullshit

I’ll be fine

Out of it all

Im still just happy that ….once upon a time

…last friday

you were mine

Forever you will be a good memory

and stay in my heart

I will cherish the moments we had

But like any story

It had to end