For Marie

Well, it has been a very very long time on FOD. Hell, I’m a veteran of the ol’ Open Diary before it fell on financial hardship and had to ask for money (back in the day when everything worked all at the same time and we didn’t want to ring the programmer’s necks.) That’s besides the point, however.

The fact of the matter is I’ve made many good friends on here, some of them people from my hometown who, through this diary, I’ve become even closer to and am able to keep in contact with even though I don’t go home all that often. It has given me the chances to write fiction and have people read it and find other great writers and learn more about the world.

I owe OD a lot, and there is nothing more that I owe it for than for those few special people whose lives I’ve been able to read about and become a better person through their insight and through my trials to try and help them. Of course, I’ll probably be forever paying them back for all they’ve helped me.

One of my long-term friends who I met through Silent Knight, is a girl from Nebraska named Marie. Now, she has dealt with a lot of hard times lately and is always dealing with herself. I know all too well how big of an enemy your own mind and doubts can be and how the world only makes matter worse and I haven’t been the greatest at trying to lift her up. But I want her to know that there are still some honest strangers that love her enough to wish her well.

I’m not going to tell you that you should stay. I’m pretty sure I understand what’s going on and I think it’s awful what’s happened and I can’t believe people would do such a thing. I hope that you don’t believe the whole world’s that way….keep the faith that you’ve sometimes found and that has taken a beating…..it’s what makes you better than them….it’s what makes you touch people.

I’m going to try something, despite the fact that I’m finding it hard to put the words together, but we’ll see how it goes:

To Marie:

Saw your picture once,

Put a face to the words,

And it did not do justice

To the beautiful things you say,

The wonderful things you feel,

The way that you seem all too real…

I’ve watched you from a far,

Wondering how it is that you can doubt

The great things that you are,

All the things that make you so much better

Than the people who try to hurt you,

I wish you could see it the way I do….

You’ve made me better than I am,

Though I’ve never been able to do the same,

I’ll keep trying as long as I can,

I wish there was more that I could do.

So this is for you, just a little song,

To keep you going when the day gets too long…

I hope you keep this with you where you go,

To remind you of the people who care,

There’s no other it’s been a bigger honor to know,

And though I’m not a religious man,

For your happiness I’ll say a prayer each night,

And hope that your life turns out all right.

Eh…I’m not too proud of that….it was kind of off the cuff. I just hope that you read this and that you remember me. Marie, I know I haven’t really been as supportive as I really have felt….cuz my social skills aren’t all that great at times……but this is for you Marie.

I’m sorry that things have turned out the way they did…..I wish you well….and one day when I’m rich and famous, look for a huge check in the mail and the obituaries of a few nasty people….;)