cat midwifery and satellite kisses.

the morning again, sun creeping in little circle shaped cracks, but the nights stretch already, time to harvest – I sleep late these mornings, no appetite during the day – in maru s room where I stay right now the light comes in through the sitex panels, commercial road runs non-stop right beside my head as I sleep and the pavement is beaten down by a murder of pedestrians – 

the striplight too bright as i smoke another bowl of weed and G is passed out in a curlicue at the end of the mattress – its been a whole week of abandon and debauchery – right or wrong, whos counting – I rescue Adam from the acid rain in the Garden of Eden one night but he runs off to ride fire trucks – drunk dialling, messages more confusing than Roscos –

the party still in full swing but i leave in two hours to go look on Brick Lane for my stolen bicycle – yes, its terribly true, my bike got stolen, i am gutted, really sad, she was a sweet little number, i loved her well – oh Falcon, you ghost and angel flyer

i m wearing my mourning blacks – with two-tone stripey socks, i almost passed for fancy dress – but the girls have got the handle on that with the inflatable hammer and bling and roses – i m addicted to drum and bass, Cristina tells me by the bonfire – 

naked lunch. nude supper. thin chainmail veils over the face of the bride as she strokes a kitten into submission – Bilbo s such a doughball – Mischa gives birth in front of all of us as we watched william burroughs descend into madness, or finds out whats really going on in the interzone – the bug powder on the chained lips of a junkie kiss – the results are one tiny little kitten, Mischa squeals twice and then gives up as the little thing comes out backfeet first, stillborn, someone starts freaking out, but I pull on the legs of the little one to bring it fully into this world, its head clears the birth canal and mammy knows what to do, stimulation of body and soul by a rasping mothers tongue – five minutes later the new arrival is flopping about blindly for the teat – Mischa squealed as I pulled on the kitten, I feel so bad for interfering, but I kept telling her to push one last time and she wouldnt, I think she knew that it was a breech birth, that she might need help and that is why she gave birth with humans around, she had been so cute and affectionate with us all day (I did not even know she was pregnant)  

i had a great evening with Jerome and his friend Hannah the other night – well of course i did i got fucked senseless, wet the sheets ________________________________________________________________________________________________ – Hannah is cute, a sweet blonde with a big bum – she has never been with a girl before and we play even more after Jerome has turned the other direction and closed his eyes – I hope she sees the lust in my eyes but she is a bit nervous, anxious, god knows why – the next afternoon Hannah leaves early and the two of us cuddle on the couch and watch hipster movies, his arm cradles my rump I am still just wrapped in a blanket and well aware of the fact – I want more, I want to hang out all day, I want to grasp his face and stare deep into his eyes, I want to do normal things together, but I have to work that evening and head off after the discovery of the stolen bicycle –

work annoys as it was meant to be 2 hours now only one and sure its a lot of fun with Martin and the oriental guy we drain his drinks cabinet however and Martin convinces me to go clubbing after and I end up paying for the taxi back to my place– half my wages gone and I need to save for a new ride – le sigh. We re oblivious of the fact that its 0500 and Carlos shouts up the stairs to turn it down when we start playing music – but I m proud that, even in that drunken state, I knew the right thing to do was to turn off the music and go to sleep – the walls are paper thin and the 3 rooms scattered through the ruined and creaking squatted building can hear everything –   

Piero tells me to ‘get over it’ (the stolen bike) but I am not ready for this, I am in fact furious about the pain in my heart, I miss my bike, I miss the leather saddle that had been to more countries than most people, I miss the alleycat race cards in the back wheel from messenger days, I miss the crosstop brakes, the white cable from Evans, everything, everything – life is unfair again and I will not just ‘get over it’ – its like the end of an era, the loss of my old messenger bike, i am determined to get it back –

Normal
0

false
false
false

EN-GB
X-NONE
X-NONE</w:LidThemeComplexScript>

<w:LsdException Locked=”false” Priority=”62″ SemiHidden=”false”
UnhideWhenUsed=”false” Name=”Light Grid Accent 2″/>

<w:LsdException Locked="false" Priority="65" SemiHidden="false"
UnhideWhenUsed=”false” Name=”Medium List 1 Accent 6″/>