Life Began Out There.

In some ways this week was as hard as the week my brother died. There was alot of drama going on with his wife and son and our parents. Alot of shit I am not going to go into here but I found out all about it about 5 minutes after leaving his grave. To tell the truth not the best time to deal with drama.. Part of me felt like throwing my phone out the window and just driving away and not look back. I did get pissed off at my sister-in-law. Not so much that she was going to go out on a double date but that she kind of put her son in danger by going to a BBQ with strangers with him and not telling anyone about it. I realized I had ZERO control. There was not a damn thing I could do. Since my brother died I have no legal rights. She can do just about anything she wants with the boy and I could not stop her. When you tell a protector he cannot do his job it really fucking hurts. All turned out ok and I believe she now knows her mistake but what the future holds none knows.

This was also the week BattleStar Galactica had its series finale. My brother and I LOVED this show. We had watched it since day one. That was about 8 years ago or so. We talked about it non stop. We would call each other during the breacks and compare notes. We talked for a good 15 or 20 minutes after every show going over everything and guessing what was next. Basically it was our show period… Friday it all came to an end. The story came to its end and I did not have my lil brother to talk about it too. It started at 7 am that morning. They went thru 13 hours of the show up to the finale and I watched it all. About half way thru I got so tired I had to stop and take a nap. It was not because it was hard work watching it but because it was so hard not to lose it all the way thru. I thought the episode was great. I only had one small complaint. I did not like the fact Starbuck was some kind of angle. I believe the writes wrote themselves into a corner and could not find there way out. But after that last episode ended I lost it. I mean LOST IT. It took about 20 minutes for me to regain control. Amy just held me until I ran down. I don’t know at some points she may have been holding me down instead of just holding me. I actually thought that phone would ring with him on the other side to let me know what he thought about it. Damn it hurt bad.

I told an 8 year old boy this weekend that he was the closest thing to a Best Friend I had now. The sad thing is that’s it true.

________________________________________________________

"Bare is the back without brother to guard it."