fatty mcfaterson….

Thats what I am! I have gained a lot of weight.. more than I wanted too and i still have 10.5 weeks left…. I have gained a total of 29 pounds…. :s Most people gain that throughout their ENTIRE pregnancy I still have 2 in a half months to go…. i am not impressed with myself. What is odd is that other than my belly the only place that i have really gained the weight is my arms, and my face, well Shaun says my arms got bigger but they were massive to begin witgh… (i have and always have had big "Baba" arms…. like old lady jiggly arms"  my face is slightly bigger but its not that bad because I still have my cheek dimple, but when my hair is up my face looks a lot bigger… 

I am not getting depressed over this, or thinking i’m unattractive, i am just not impressed with how unhealthy this makes me. I have been very lazy this past month in a half and gained 14 pounds… seriously? that is not cool. I gained 15 pounds in like 5.5 months, i’m pretty much 7 months now and doubled what I gained. If i keep this up its going to be next to impossible to loose my baby weight and one of my biggest fears is taking my kid to the park and being that fat mom who can’t play on the play structure, or can’t fit down the slide, then sits there on the grass watching her kid play and lights up a cig…. ugh.

I have been really enjoying my pregnant body, i feel huge but in a cute kind of way. A lot of people I haven’t seen inawhile tell my I look fantastic, and this guy at work Dan was like "You know how some pregnant woman just look haggard and super ugly…. well you look great pregnant, and you have this glow to you, your not haggard at all, you can look a lil tired at times but you look great pregnant" Which made me feel really good.

Often I wonder – are people just saying that? But then i’m like, why would they say anything about how i look if i looked ugly? When my friend Cheryl was preggers she looked brutal, just a mess, and all i did was talk about her belly I never said " you look good". also this super blunt woman in lac du bonnet named Rose, who is the kind of woman who will be like "hey did you gain weight?" or "whats up with your hair today?" "oooo you died your hair, i don’t like it" told me i looked great when i ran into her…

I am on a i am beautiful kick, no matter how huge I am, but when i hopped on that scale yesterday I just kept thinking what the heck am i gonna look like when this belly is no longer hard, the baby is out and all this is just a huge pil of wiggly, jiggly fat…. 

Anyway I worked on my ellipitical yesterday, its not easy anymore and I could handle 20 mins of it. then I went for 2 15 min walks. Normally I could walk longer, but 5 mins into my walk I had to pee, and then i kept walking but then i couldn’t handle it anymore so i had to turn around and come home so I tried again…. 5 mins into my walk I had to pee…. not fun, not fun. I also ate a lil better, well kind of, I had a lil bad of chips and like 4 home made cookies but that was before I found out how much weight i had gained lol… so i got home had dinner, and then when i got hungry i had grapes and yogurt…. no more cereal, no more late night ice cream treats (which was rare to begin with) no more at home chips, no more late night popcorn… 🙁 

I am really worried about my health too….  not so much my looks, but i don’t want to become diabetic, I don’t want to get a heart attack, or ever have to lift up my gut to wash under it….  yes i went there!

On another note, I have my frist yoga session on Monday! I am super excited to see if i can get back into it. Whats going to be funny is to see how far behind i am… i was never that limber but i know i know i’m way behind…. i used to be able to lay my hands flat on the group, when i started yoga i could just touch, after 10 weeks i had my hands flat, now i can’t even touch the ground… i don’t even t hink i can touch my ankles… haha, but i’m gonna do this free class, and see if it would be worth it, to sign up for the class until baby is born….did i already talk about this? meh…

well i think i’m done bantering on about my weight gain, and my body….