Eight more days till IPD

That’s right folks, only eight more days until International Paedophile Day! (Also known as Halloween, if you want to give it the more fanciful and less honest title)

From the moment they are old enough to understand, you teach children not to talk to strangers. Not to chat to people they don’t know. And definitely not to take candy and sweets from people they don’t know.

And every month in the press we get told that "sex-offenders who are let out of jail are a DANGER to our children and we should SHUN them like the dogs they are"

But then – for one day a year – you tell the kids to ignore everything they have ever been taught. Talking to strangers? Great idea! Chatting with them? Go nuts! Take sweets from them? Why not? I mean it’s got to be perfectly safe for them to take candy from the weirdo at the end of the road you usually get told to avoid – it’s Halloween and even the most noxious, perverted old man wouldn’t dare to abuse a kid on a night such as this!

I know there are some responsible parents that only let their kids go to the homes of people they themselves know, but apparently none of those parents live around here, because every year people come knocking on my door, and I don’t know any of my neighbours, or anyone who lives in the town.

So clearly they can’t really care about what their children are doing if they let them knock on every door in the street, since there are good odds that they won’t know everyone – possibly won’t know anyone.

But, quite honestly, all that is fine.

Don’t get me wrong, I do not condone child abuse, and think that people who do molest children (whether they are strangers or the kid’s parents) deserve everything they get. 

All I mean is that it is up to the parents of the children to decide whether they want to let them go knocking on strangers’ doors, or whether they actually care about what happens to them. 

No – what really annoys me about International Paedophile Day is the fact that it is also International Demand Money With Menaces Day. 

Most of the "kids" who come calling on my are not actually kids, they are teenagers. Teenagers who think that IPD is an excuse to knock on my door and demand money. Not sweets – but money. Usually four or five at once – enough to be somewhat intimidating – and generally not actually dressed up in costumes. 

If they came up to you on the street and demanded money, most people would consider that to be a mugging. Or extortion.

But because they are coming round on specific night of the year, they can knock on the door of a complete stranger and demand money, otherwise their windows get egged, or their cars trashed or their trees covered in silly string. 

And, as far as I can tell, no one seems to think this is a double standard. Everyone seems to think it is just a bit of fun. 

Happily, I have managed to work out a way to deal with all this hypocrisy and adolescent thuggery – I ignore it.

From the moment I get home, I turn out the lights, retreat to my bedroom and watch horror movies all night (Although this year will be the Twilight Saga in preparation for Breaking Dawn II coming out). Last year I used it to do plot prep for NanoWriMo and watch Christine, Carrie and The Stand. 

All in all, not a bad way to spend the evening, even if I am doing it because I have no desire to be extorted or threatened. 

But still –

Remember, remember
The day before November, 
When children forget what they’ve learned.
To ignore the plain danger
Of taking candy from strangers,
Just watch them in case they get burned.

(okay – so poetry is not my strong point)