little of this and little of that.

Warning no editing was done in the making of this entry. 

Can I get some sunshine. I read somewhere that you have to make your own happiness. I wonder to myself why do we (humans) make it so hard to be happy. I know a big majority of the reason is because we depend on others to make us happy and that is mistake number one. I know now that I need to take a go hard look at the way I want my life to be and stop confusing it with the way I  think society wants my life to be.

After my last little rant about work I think I have finally got it figured out. As long as I keep my mouth shut I can do what ever I want. What I want is to be left alone to do my job and I realized that my in your face attitude was counter productive to that goal. So I have been very very quiet lately, just doing my work and not making a stink. It has my managers worried, they come by every once in awhile ask if I’m okay, I say I’m fine, with no elaboration and go back to doing my job. They don’t know how to deal with a quiet me.

I found out that I have some degeneration in one my my disk, which was causing the back pain I have been dealing with for a while now. The fix is to strengthen my core muscles to stabilize the disk, so I will be trying to do daily rehab at home alternating between my back and my knee. Man I turn 30 and fall the hell apart. I am hoping that rehab will translate into muscle building which should translate into fat loss. As you can see from my ticker, I have gained 5lbs. I fell off the wagon and into a tub of ice cream and then ate my way out. Some of the weight is water weight, but weight is weight and my clothes can’t tell the difference. I am trying to become passionate about working out so I am still trying on different motivations. I need some help.  Well guess I’ll go get on those PT exercises.

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