Entitlement

I’ve always had female best friends in my life. I just felt more comfortable opening up to them than my male friends. And of course my current best friend, my wife, is also female. My point is, I’ve always seen what goes on in girl world. And I’ve always known it’s a crazy world! 😛

But recently I’ve noticed a new crazy tendency in there, and that’s the stealing of thunder or sense of entitlement. I’m not quite sure how to describe it, but here’s what I’ve noticed:

Sally and I get engaged. Her best friend gets mad at me that night because she wasn’t there for the proposal, even though it was at my birthday party and she was invited but didn’t attend. I obviously didn’t spread the word around I was proposing because I kind of wanted it to be a surprise… oh and she later forgave me for her not being there for it. What? haha

Other than her bitchfit, Sally’s other good friends flood her with fb posts and texts saying "I better be a bridesmaid!", or "I better be the maid of honor!". They threw a "congrats!" in there too, but I don’t think it’s sincere when it’s attached to a demand that they get something out of it

We walk around the UH tailgate the following football season to hang out with buds from college. My old female friends there would say "I better be invited to the wedding!". even if I hadn’t seen them in years or the fact we’ve never hung out outside of a tailgate or UH football game, haha

But I think it really throws me off recently after the news of us expecting our first kid. "I better be the godmother!". What? That really makes no sense to me. This isn’t an invitation to be in the wedding party or attend a wedding, it’s the position of getting custody of our kid should the worst case scenario happen and both my wife and I die

One of her best friends, Tammy, is already under the assumption she’ll be the godmother. She’ll tell Sally that she should be because her mom’s best friend is her godmother. Umm… yea.. that would be keeping your family tradition, it has nothing to do with how we’ll run our family

It’s really odd that one of Sally’s co-workers told her she wants to be the godmother. Sally has been at that job for 5 months. A 5-month friendship and you think you deserve to be the godmother? Crazy!

Sally and I have a really specific criteria for anyone to be a godparent candidate. Happy marriage, good moral values, good credit, owns a house, family-oriented and regularly attends family events. The two mentioned above wouldn’t meet the criteria. Tammy: not married, history of bad partner choices, horrible credit, doesn’t own a house, isn’t in either of our families so tough spot for attending family events from either side. The co-worker: Unhappy marriage, her husband is a jobless alcoholic, bad credit because of jobless husband and her inablity to stop spending, no house, and again not in our families, hasn’t even met anyone in our families

And call me old-fashioned with southern hospitality and all, but don’t these count as threats? "I better be….", that phrase is the first half of a threat. It’s usually followed by "… or else…."

My wife also dislikes the drama of girl world, so she just laughs off these things and let them assume it’ll happen to avoid the drama. But I keep telling her to put them in their place now before they get too attached to the idea and get their feelings hurt later

moral of the story: when someone shows up with an attitude of entitlement, understand that under it is a boatload of anxiety

Have a Nice Day!