2/20/07
This has been an interesting past week or so. I feel like I am slipping into a mini-depression, but have no clue why. This is supposed to be the most happy exciting time of my life. I can’t even put into words what I am feeling, but it’s not good. It has nothing to do with Will, or not wanting to marry him. I definitely love the boy and can’t wait to spend my life with him. It’s something else……………I just don’t know what.
I am trying to convince my principal that it is a good idea for me to go on the mission trip to Mexico again this year. It’s not looking overly positive.
I am going wedding dress shopping next weekend. My sister Christy got married a few months ago, and yesterday I decided to try on her dress. I really really love it, but I’m not sure how I would feel about wearing a dress that has already been worn. It is SO pretty though. It’s a $6000 dollar dress, and if I am going to look for one that is similar anyway, is it really worth spending more money? My mom is convinced that I need to have my own. The thing is that I HATE shopping for clothes and I am already dreading the dress shopping. Oh well.
I don’t think I am going to be teaching next year (this is causing me extreme mixed emotions). It’s looking like we will be moving to Orange County, California. Will is going to move there and beging work at the beginning of the summer, but I won’t move until right after our wedding (Sept. 1st). The school year will have already begun. I guess I could move out there early in the summer and try to prepare for a year of teaching, but I feel overwhelmed with everything going on. I think it might be best to take a year off from teaching, get some random job, and just focus on being a wife, settling into California, etc. I don’t know though–it also makes me feel like I am kind of being a slacker. Any opinions are welcome.
Have a good day everybody!
Don’t feel like a slacker. Maybe you need a year off teaching to get your passion back!
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if finances are okay, I would definitely take a year off and search for that dream job. It’d be better than jumping into a job you don’t want just for the sake of having a job.
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I don’t think that would make you a slacker. You would just be putting the emphasis on different areas of your life instead of teaching – it’s not like you’d be quitting teaching and doing NOTHING, ya know? You’d be doing it so you could focus on being a wife, getting adjusted to life in Cali, and exploring other job options. I’m sorry you’ve been feeling crappy. Maybe it’s because even though part of you is hugely excited about your future, another part of you is also scared and kind of sad to leave your current life behind? Adjusting is always a hard thing to do, even if you are adjusting for the better. *hugs*
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I think it is actually smart to wait a year to teach. It will be tough moving to another state, getting married, and getting a new teaching job on top of all of that. That way you can give yourself some time to get acquainted with California education standards and all that jazz.
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Maybe instead of looking at dress shopping as a chore because you’re trying on clothes, look at it as a chance of buying a dress that may stay in your family for generations. And don’t feel like a slacker, maybe you could be a subsitute until you find a permanent job. My mom does this in Florida and loves it because it’s flexible. Good luck!
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I may be in the same boat you’re in. We may be moving in the next year for Hubby to go to grad school. Nothings definite but I’m trying to look at it as an adventure with my Husband. I think it’s a great idea to take off from work the first year there to get acquainted with the city, the new church and of course spending time with your new Hubby. If you can, volunteering somewhere may be a goodway to find new friends and other passions you have.
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I think you should do what makes you happiest; why work somewhere that will make you miserable? Being unhappy at a job can affect all aspects of your life. Like punkarelli said, maybe taking a year off will renew your passion–or maybe it will show you a different path that you want to explore. As for dress shopping, if you don’t want to spend a lot of money, why not find a design you love thatlooks good on you, take a picture, and have a seamstress make it? It’s a whole lot cheaper.
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Could you just have the dress altered a little, add a different veil, some change to the trim, etc. To make it more your “own?” As for teaching, you can always sub for a year (I know, not real teaching, but there are longer term sub jobs for maternity leaves, etc) and you may get a job mid-year, anyway. People move or leave for various reasons. Just a thought.
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so, you are going to the O.C. huh? welcome to the O.C., bitch LOL. hmmm, anyway congrats on that, it’ll be quite an experience, i bet. i don’t think it’s bad that you want to take a year off from teaching. it might be a good idea to get settled in. and if you got a job in a restaurant or something in the meantime, that would be an excellent way to meet some people and make some friends.
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also, i agree with above noters, your feelings could just be because of the adjustment to change. even if the change is a happy one, it can still leave you feeling sad.
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aww im sorry hun!! but, OC is amazing, you will really like this area… no more snow for you though
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Perhaps what you should do during your year off is be taking classes in order to qualify for a CA teaching credential. The standards to obtain this often change from year to year, and there is a very good possibility you will need to take at least a couple of classes in order to meet them.
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ryn: no, actually, wellbutrin, what I take, doesn’t hgurt your sex drive. as a matter of fact, while I was taking it, I had a pretty decent sex drive. Not fabulous like it was before I got on bc, but pretty good. I’ve stopped taking it though. It made me really not care about anything, and while that’s good, I was letting my kids go crazy b/c I just didn’t care. I havent taken it in a few wks
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ryn: I have done fine since I got off of it. I never really noticed a change. Taking it was to calm my anger, and I have just tried to learn how to calm my anger by myself. I never took it religiously, and it was low-dose, so I don’t think I was really able to get latched onto it. I still keep a bottle with me in case I’m having a really bad day, but I haven’t had one of those in a while.
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Taking the year off from teaching would definitely not make you a slacker. Especially if it gives you the oppurtunity to find the Right teaching job. Have you thought of substitute teaching as your in-between job once you move to California? I don’t know but, Would that give you a chance to keep teaching while checking out different schools?
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