2/9/07
I love Will. There is no doubt about that, but I find myself getting frustrated about how metrosexual the boy is. I am a casual girl. I feel my best when my hair is up in a ponytail and I am wearing a sweatshirt. Will always dresses and looks super nice. I know he doesn’ mean to, but he sometimes makes comments that make me feel inadequate in the way I look/dress. Two nights ago we had a disagreement about what we will wear for our engagement pics (we’re getting them done on Sunday). I wanted to wear nice jeans and a sweater because that is an outfit that I feel comfortable in. He wants us to be really dressed up because we will have these pictures forever, and he wants us to look our best. I know it sounds like a trivial disagreement, and in honesty it is. My problem is that it is very difficult for me to find clothes that I feel I look good in. Admittedly I need to get more clothes. If I find something I like, I get it in every color, which limits my wardrobe. None the less, I don’t want to feel like I have to impress Will with the way I look or dress. I want him to just love me, and think I am beautiful even when I feel gross. So, long story short. We agreed that I would go shopping, and if I didn’t find anything I liked, then I would wear a dress that I wore to a wedding we went to earlier this year. I wasn’t thrilled about the idea because I still wanted us to take the pics in nice casual clothes. Yesterday his sister called me and told me Will was going to babysit his nephew Saturday morning, and invited me to go shopping with her. I feel so frustrated with Will because I know he asked his sister to take me shopping. I also know it’s not fair to be frustrated because he meant well. I just wish that he could understand that when I am not content with the way I look, there is nothing I want to do less than shop for clothes(esp. with his size 2 beautiful sister). I have never had a boyfriend who cared so much about fashion, and I am not quite sure how to deal with it. I just want to feel like I can be me.
We are going to visit his family in Kansas City this weekend. I am excited-that is always a great time.
I wish there was some magic cure that could make me feel beautiful, or at least allow me to accept myself for who I am. Oh well….I will get there eventually.
Have a happy Friday!!
* I love it when I overhear my kids having silly conversations–today they were talking about the differences between boys and girls. One of the boys was like "sometimes I wish I could be a girl because they paint their nails and get to go out in public like that!". Another boy was talking about how he sometimes tries on his sisters cheerleading uniform. What?!? These boys are silly.
The metrosexual thing would drive me crazy, too. My husband is a little like that, a dressy dresser. He’s gotten used to my more casual style, though, so it’s much less of an issue after a year and a half of marriage. I’m hopeful that Will will be the same way. I do wish you could see yourself as others do…a beautiful woman. But most of us never really get comfortable in our skin.. sad.
Warning Comment
I’m sorry you feel insecure about how you look. I seriously thought you were a size 2 when I saw pics of you. You are very tiny.
Warning Comment
Why not tell Will exactly what you wrote here? He loves you, and I’m sure he would do his best to be understanding and sympathetic about this. Plus, I’m sure the last thing he wants is to make you uncomfortable! As for the shopping trip, sometimes boys think they’re helping when they’re really not, and they don’t get that–it’s definitely a boy thing. I also really wish you would believe that you’re beautiful, because you ARE! But the only person who can make you believe that is you, and you have to want it more than anything and be willing to fight back all the negative crap that you will think along the way. <3
Warning Comment
if you don’t want to dress up tell him this: “i want the pictures to reflect how we truly are in life.” I am the same way, I’m not too keen on dressing up either. good luck:OP
Warning Comment
and besides, if that’s you in the pic, you have nothing to worry about girl! here i am trying to loose a good 50lbs just so I can fit into a nice wedding dress, and you think your ugly! you’re not.
Warning Comment
Have you ever gone to Kohl’s to find clothes? The Juniors department is where I found that outfit for myself for my cousin’s wedding. I can ALWAYS find something there, they have a lot of dressy stuff. RYN: If someone goes OD+ only for their favorites, like my favorite Anna is doing, then regular OD people can’t read them.
Warning Comment
compromise. do like steven and I did. I wore a simply white sundress and he wore khacki, flip flops, and a white button up with the sleeves rolled up, no tie or anything. just like summery casual
Warning Comment
i think he’s a dressy guy b/c he’s going to be a pastor, so it’s kind of habitual to be dressed up since his job will require him to dress up. you have a beautiful body, please don’t think the size 2 chick is prettier than you. not all size 2 bodies are attractive!! in fact, very few are!
Warning Comment
I know that you two have already made a decision about wearing dressy clothes for the photos, but it sounds like you aren’t at all pleased about it. Why not compromise, and have a change of clothes mid-way through? Sort of like senior photos, that way you can get a nice dressy pic, and a relaxed pic… 🙂
Warning Comment
A lot of places will let you change your outfit… for 4 pictures in one set, and the other 4 in a different set. Maybe you could compromise!
Warning Comment
i think you should dress like whatever is comfortable for you. that’s just you. he should accept it and you instead of trying to get you to change. *shrug* just my $0.02. having said that, i hope you have a fun time shopping. you might as well try to have a good time? *shrug* oh well.
Warning Comment
i would feel the same way about it as you do, i’m totally a casual girl as well. you’ve already gotten lots of great advice, and i’d say just talk to him about it and i’m sure he’ll be great about it! the convos are hilarious, i love little kids 🙂
Warning Comment