1/18/07

Kids can be so mean sometimes. There is a little boy in my class who has been horribly disruptive the past few days (the whole year actually). He got in trouble today-nothing major I took a bag of candy off his desk that he was playing with (he shouldn’t have had it out anyway). I told him he could have it back at the end of the day. He threw a fit and yelled out "You are so mean. I don’t even know why you’re a teacher!" I know he’s a kid, and was just angry, but it still hurt my feelings (not to mention it was disrespectful, but that’s another issue). I really don’t think I am a mean teacher. I feel like I am always trying to do nice stuff for these guys. I spend a ton of my OWN money on them (which I don’t have a lot of). They are never thankful. They only remember the negative. Oh well. He seems to be over it now.

Wedding planning is kicking in. We are visiting my top choice for the reception on Saturday. I talked with the music teacher at my school, and my first graders from last year and this years fourth graders are going to sing during the service. That will probably end up being one of my favorite parts of the whole wedding!! I think we are going to do a cake and punch reception for all of the school kids/families before the real reception. I wish I could have everybody at the real reception, but that would be ridiculously expensive. There are kids at the school who I feel closer to than others, but I wouldn’t want to hurt anyone’s feelings by only inviting certain students to the whole deal.

I am praying so hardcore that I am able to teach younger kids again next year.  I will need to be flexible if any teaching position is available, but I SO want to be a first grade teacher again. I guess I could always work at a daycare next year, or maybe waitress again. Who knows? SO much to think about. My thoughts are so scattered–I don’t even know what to focus on, or where to start.

Will and I are having a bigger wedding party than I would have probably liked.  He has seven very close guy friends, and it is important to me that he has my little brother stand up. That brings us to eight. Holy cow. I am having my three sisters, Will’s two sisters, and my three best friends. At least the church where we are getting married is huge, so it shouldn’t look too wierd having that many people stand up. My cousin got married there and had TEN bridesmaids! I would prefer less, but I know it means a lot to Will. Please not notes on how large the party is because I am already nervous about it!

I am so glad tomorrow is Friday.

People have asked if Will knows about my ED. Yes, he does. He’s really supportive and knows I am going to counseling to work on it.