manic monday

on the side of the highway today there were a bunch of rolled up rugs, diferent colors and sizes but all scattered along the median. if it were a movie there probably would have been bodies rolled up inside them, but as it stands my life is not cinema and so they were mostly just waterlogged. cars kept swerving around them and it caused traffic backup. i don’t know why this is important. i think it was just the composition of it. the juxtaposition. makes me mention it here when likely you don’t care. too bad. things have been standing out all day, i’ve been noticing little things that don’t really amount to much in the grand scheme of things but they’re filed away in my memory and here on tee oh dee because, i don’t know. because today i’m feeling a little manic, jumpy and excitable. i feel like my brain has been on vacation for a while, sleeping on the beach somewhere and it just got home and its plane was late and its pissed because the dog ate all the houseplants and no one picked up the mail or the drycleaning and now it has all this work to do and not enough time to do it so things are rushed and falling in and out of place. i like run on sentences, so fuck you. jumbled. that’s a good word for today. i feel like a crossword puzzle. or a blender. on frappe.
that girl in my psych class, the one who wears white like she invented it, wore brown today and i noticed she chews on her pens.
in class, we talked about freud and psychosexual stages and defenses. i laughed a little every time the teacher said “freud says…” because i used to have this annoying friend, a boy named scott, who overanalyzed everything and was whiny and too sensitive and after awhile we stopped calling him scott and just called him “freud sez.” oh, things. anywhey. repression and projection were brought up and i wonder how many times a day people repress and project and deny and blame and never even stop to think about what they’re doing or why. i don’t know if it all comes down to conflict in the potty training stage like freud suggests, but it’s interesting enough.
i don’t have anything to say about former gee eff or art school girl or goodwill girl or you. well. that’s a lie. but i’m not going to say it.