my family is full of selfish cunts

 I took a nap today.  It was unprecedented, because I do not nap.  I barely sleep at night.  I’ve just been so tired all week.

I’ve been having pain in my shoulders lately.  I believe that the culprit is my excessively heavy backpack.  On Tuesdays and Thursdays, I have to bring my whole life with me to school, as I am there from 8:00 AM to 9:00 PM.  This bag weighs about a ton.  I never really thought that carrying a heavy backpack could cause back pain.  I thought it was one of those things that people whined about because they didn’t want to bring their books with them.

Go figure.

I have a ton of shit that I need to do, and little inspiration to do any of it.  I suppose that might change after I sleep, but I doubt it.

I’m typing like I’m drunk or something, and it’s making me irrationally angry.

I have the worst case of dry skin ever.  Winter needs to end.  Perhaps…now.

No?

I have nothing to say, but no one to say it to.  Sorry, “no one to whom I can say it.” 

I haven’t written about my aunt in awhile.  She’s been in the hospital for 6 weeks now, and is still alive.  All of her shitty siblings, (my mother excluded) have stopped calling or otherwise communicating with her.  They’re all such shitbags.  I really hate them.  She’s getting immensely lonely.  You’d think with 5 brothers and sisters, this wouldn’t be an issue.  But they’re all just shitty people.

Example: one of my aunts keeps posting “updates” on facebook, and her posts will get a bunch of likes, and comments such as “praying for her,” and “you’ve been such a good sister through all of this.”  Which is complete bullshit, but I’ll get to that in a moment.  All these people like to make a show of how thoughtful and “good” they are, but not a single one could be bothered to send a card or make a phone call.  It’s about the show, not about real actions, and it makes me sick.

But this aunt (let’s call her Cuntface) has NOT been a good sister through all of this.  She has been terrible.  Not just terrible.  Cruel, I think, would be a good word.  The first day my aunt was able to talk on the phone (she had extensive smoke damage to her throat from the fire) Cuntface decided to go against the doctor’s orders and tell my aunt about the extensive damage to her apartment (total loss) and the death of all her pets.  Nearly killed her doing it.  Cuntface has done a number of equally awful things, but makes it a point on facebook to give the “updates,” as if she actually gives a shit.

I think Cuntface might be a sociopath, but that’s giving her intelligence far too much credit.  Maybe she’s just amazingly selfish.

I won’t call her on her cuntery, because I am an adult, but it’s infuriating.  It makes me want to unfriend all of my relatives.  But last time I did that, he died, so…maybe not.

I just don’t understand how these people can be so…awful.  If my sister’s apartment had burned down, and she had suffered extensive burns to the lower half of her body, and had had one leg amputated at the hip, and was in danger of losing the other one, and had lost all of her cats and possessions and her voice and her mobility, I wouldn’t be so…indifferent.  With 5 brothers and sisters, you’d think she’d be on the phone 5 times a day.

My family is full of selfish cunts.