Every promise I made I’m rescinding.

At least, it seems that way.

I have to reply to the e-mail U of M sent me, telling me that they would only accept my application if I took a language this summer.  I feel that I lack the delicacy to perform such a task, especially when it is still my strongest urge to just send a “fuck you” e-mail.

I leave for New York in exactly one week, 2 hours.  I will be playing at Carnegie Hall next Saturday.  I’ve been looking forward to this since last August.  And yet, I find my enthusiasm dwindling in the face of the never-ending homework, standardized tests, my inevitable graduation, and the prospect of a long, horrible summer working full-time at a job I detest.  College next year is failing to interest me, because, really, it won’t be different from high school.  In fact, I’m fairly certain that the next year or so of my life is going to be unbearably boring.

Of course, I’m in a foul mood.

I’d really like to go for a nice walk and enjoy the spring-like weather, but…I have at least 2 more hours of homework to do.  Probably shouldn’t have taken this break. 

Actually, I don’t know why I bother with the homework, as I’m never going to be any good at anything anyway.  But that’s a completely different post.