closer to the sun

last night

woah

I got drunk

and not just a little

and I um

had very nice drunken unprotected coitus with my neighbor

whoops

or not whoops?

And this morning he made me coffee while I waited to wake my roommate (who locked me out) up

which is why I’m awake right now

No mention of the fact that we had unprotected sex and I have herpes

or the fact that we were gonna wait….?

or the fact that he said he was really feeling his alone time…3 days ago

 

no expectations

except, this is only guy #4

and I don’t really count #3

and I get emotionally attached very easily

very easily

and I have no idea what is going to happen next

probably nothing

hopefully more sex though,

our chemistry is crazy

when he got up this morning I watched him walk around and thought how incredibly attracted to him I am

and how I’m going to get hurt

I always get hurt

I sometimes wonder if this is some sort of self flagellation

whatever

there isn’t much left of my battered heart anyways