As Ever

I’m not even sure why I’m writing tonight. Scott is back on campus again, and the house is quiet. And I do love to write when it’s so lovely and quiet. I can’t help but think of all the hours at BW El Rey after the sun was down and the guests had stopped trickling in. Something about me still feels young when I put on the jazz music and write a few lines, especially (!!) on OD. But there’s no way I can afford the $40/year to keep my OD page functioning right now, so it’s kind of a moot point.

Being “back in school” again is for the birds. I. am. not. enjoying. this. any. more.

That probably sounds more dramatic than I feel right now. I really am in a place where I can cope from day to day. Back when I was deciding my gift for the Shea family Gift to the Christ-child, I chose to give God optimism for the future. He’s given me so much in my past, it would be insane to decide he was going to abandon me now. So I just go forward with faith and belief that things are going to work out, and work out well.

And there’s plenty to enjoy about this stage of my life, especially with my sweet boys. Oh, I am enamoured by them. Ray Ray’s enthusiasm and zest for life is tantalizing and infectious; and Sam is my last baby, so I squeeze in every kiss and snuggle and nursing that I can. I try to treasure it all.

There’s more I could say. But I’ve been crying a bit tonight — just from cute church videos and whatever was on youtube — and I’m just depleted.

As ever,
Val

Alika

Hard years make better people out of us, I think.

But they are still hard to live through.

I hope you continue to write here.

Rephastie

March 2, 2018

i Love seeing your name on my friends list and reading your thoughts. Especially El Rey memories, because who else do I know that can relate??

I decided to pay the $4 a month for a while and see if it’s worth the nostalgia. I’m finding it hard to get into it on my phone, may have to actually fire up computer more often so I can let my words spill out.

miss you.