|Entry| Pray For Me

Friends-

Pray for me. I’m caught up in cutting. It’s so hard for me to stop, and I’m not only hurting myself, but you as well. And I don’t want it to be that way. Beauty doesn’t deserve pain, and you’re all beautiful. Last night I prayed:

God, please help me get rid of all thoughts revolving cutting, don’t let me cut nor even have the object poised, give me strength to diminish this burning obsession building in me. And also, please help all the other cutters out there (listed some names), please help them stop, because cutting is not the way to solve anything. Give them strength. Also, to all my dear friends, I am sorry to cause you such a great pain and burden. Right now I need you to be there for me, so I have someone to talk to. Please don’t start cutting, I love you all too much for you to start that, and make the same mistakes I did. Also, to my adoring boyfriend, Tim, please help him, God. Please help him not do anything like that. Please give him strength to deal with a burden such as me. He means the world and so much more to me, don’t let him crumble; for surely I will crumble with him. Give him courage above all things, as well as strength. Heal all these people, as well as me. These people keep me thriving when the going gets tough.

After I prayed, I cried for awhile. Silently, tears running down my cheeks. Forever will these people guide my life. Give me one more single chance. Please. One more. i don’t deserve it, but please.

I love you all so very much

xxManda

A Psycho Princess,

Amanda Katherine Chandra Kassia Marian Phillippa de Beauchamp