Past, Present, Future

Quote: "We should not fret for what is past, nor should we be anxious about the future; men of discernment deal only with the present moment." -Chanakya

I was looking around my room the other day, which was littered with clothing and started to think about what I’d bring with me when I go away to school in the fall. Weighing what was important, what could be left behind, what wouldn’t matter in my new world, it was exciting. Liberating even. That’s the best part about a new beginning, deciding which pieces of the past you’re bringing with you.

I long for new experiences and new people. I’d like old mistakes, painful memories and past negativity to fade away. Moving out of my parent’s home and into a dorm may be the first step in making it happen. Granted, I understand the importance of the past, how it molds a person, I’m just about to enter a unique situation where I can pick and choose what makes me, me. I like it.

That said, haven’t had much of a summer.

I’ve gone to the movies, worked here and there, enjoyed the season finales of my favorite shows, but nothing of interest to report. I’m jealous of course, of everyone around me. The one’s who give me drunk dials, tell me stories of summer romance or hot shot internships. I don’t handle this part well, the waiting in the wings thing. There are plenty of stories waiting for me just around the corner, I’ve been in their shoes many times before, I should be happy for my friends. Glad for their experiences. I am. I’m just happier when I have my own news to report and lately, I’ve only been a listener.

I’m not giving up yet. It’s only been summer for about a week. Things will get better, I’ve just got to wait it out.