The Bumper Compendium of Reasons to be Miserable

1) It’s been raining continually since 3rd January 1472 and shows no signs of abating. Please weather gods- more than one type of environmental condition has been invented- feel free to use them!
2) I got my first verbal warningat work the other day for not doing the managerial side of my job properly, which is quite rich really as I’m not supposed to be DOING ANY MANAGERIAL WORK!
3) I think I’ve got cryptospyridiosisfrom the water as my guts are churning like a dairy and I feel thoroughly unwell. I’m still in the shop for my friend though as I’m a good boy.
4) My mate woke me up at 7am to tell me his baby had woken him at 5am and to ask if I wanted to play a game of Warhammer, when all I astually want to do is sleep
5)My bank account is as empty as Jade Goody’s cerebellum.
6) We’re all going to die on wednesday when some stupid scientists are going to start up some sort of experiment which will either teach us more about the atom or create a black hole and destroy a significant chunk of the galaxy. Bloody scientisits. I’ve got stuff planned…