Let this be the last time I say goodbye

You don’t mean to be standoffish but you are and even more then that you’re vague. Can’t be bothered to have real conversation. I just really wish you wouldn’t half-ass extend yourself if you really aren’t feeling it. As if being Facebook friends is somehow establishing a fucking friendship. You read my message on kik a day later and still say nothing for three days, it’s very clear to me now more then ever that I have truly wasted my own time here, my own patience and understanding. I long to be friends, to be close but I can tell you’re just not in it for the long run. And I think what makes me the most upset is I told you if you weren’t having it to just fucking tell me so right then before if ever went anywhere. I genuinely wouldn’t have been offended, if anything, relieved for at least then I wouldn’t have to wonder why you’re not saying anything. I shouldn’t already feel like giving up on you but I do.

Afterthought.
I say this with doubt in my mind, how do you want me? I wonder. It’s hard to read you and maybe that’s why I am so drawn to you. The coldness which is an outward display, makes me wonder what’s in your head. I can’t help but want to pick you apart. I won’t push you, I won’t pry into your life. I want you to want to tell me things, I want you to want to talk to me but I try not to be hopeful about it because you are so far away and with distance grows colder. I won’t hold my breath.

I just wanna break you down so badly
Well I trip over everything you say
I just wanna break you down so badly
In the worst way