dont read this

i was so bored today that i designed my engagement ring online.  im sure it is far too expensive for my fiance’s budget. if he wont spend x amount on my ring, maybe i should find someone who will.

i didnt show him my design. i didnt even tell him i created one. i closed my browser, and went on with my day.

money means nothing to me. but its nice to have pretty things.

still depressed.

yesterday, i saw someone who looked like blr. it was at an intersection, therefore i couldnt just stop and ask him for his name. he was in a tan suv. i guess if i ever see that person/vehicle combination again i will do further investigation.  i havent had any contact with blr in about six years. im not completely sure why his memory is entering my mind these days. we were never close. it shouldnt matter. about two months ago, b ran into him at the dmv. that sort of sparked things, i guess. about a week ago, jch said he joined the weekly soccer game. i know he’s alive and well. i dont think it really matters one way or another. im keeping tabs, though.

ive been hungry since i woke up, but it was already late, and i needed to get to the bank and the post office. ive been home for 2 hours, and all ive eaten is one piece of provolone cheese and some white grape juice. im just too lazy to cook. while i was running errands, i thought i was going to have to pull over and vomit. it never happened. i blamed the extreme heat for my nausea. i took my medication when i got home, and the nausea decreased dramatically.

i drew some designs for the project im working on. four to be exact. i think i like the second one best. i havent begun construction. i now have ten days left.