Missing Pieces

I suppose nobody wants to note me because I’ve updated so rarely recently.  ::Shrugs::  It doesn’t matter, I guess.

I’m finding out that’s true about a lot of things concerning me.  I mean, Dolly tells me last night that a friend of hers in Texas is in the hospital due to complications with her pregnancy.  And while I felt bad that Dolly was worried, I also found myself . . . just not caring.  A part of me was saying, "She’s in the hospital.  So what?"

And I know that a lot of people, if not all people, will look at that and say how horrible it is that I think that, and maybe they’re right, but . . .  It’s what’s going on in my head.  For the most part . . .

I

just

don’t

care

anymore.

There are some things I care about.  Some things that get to me, tug on my heartstrings.

But for the most part, I find I seem to have lost my ability to empathize.

It scares me in a way.  Especially because of something I read last night.

I don’t know.  Maybe I’m just meant to be alone.

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April 18, 2008

I would feel the same way. If I’m not emotionally attached to the person, or I can’t relate to them, I just don’t… feel for them. It may be bad, but that just the way it is.

April 19, 2008

Because it could get in the way of our jobs or our ability to work together. It just can be very messy. Not to mention it is frowned upon by the business, haha.

Being alone is a choice you make, not a fate that is predestined. It sounds to me like you’ve given up on yourself. I also read your previous entry. Doesn’t seem like that letter is to “no one!”

April 22, 2008

ya know I had that same feeling about someone I know who’s girlfriend went into the hospital..sometimes we all have that “who gives” kind of attitude I guess

ryn If you play the very last line, “And she’s buying a stairway to heaven,” backwards, it sounds like, “Play backwards. Hear words sung,” (it does), and if you play the “If there’s a bustle in your hedgerow” part backwards, it sounds like… Too much to put in one note. But needless to say, it was way too creepy and I’ll never be able to listen to that song forwards or backwards again. ~

April 28, 2008

i didn’t understand your txt.

April 28, 2008

Well, if you noticed, the second poem is titled Guenevere. So, I am single, plus I’m in Japan and the girl I write about is in America. Also, she has a King Arthur, as the poem implies and my feelings for her are in spite of that relationship. This isn’t the first time she and I have been in this situation and before you ask, I honestly don’t know if she knows or has read the poems.

April 28, 2008

Nor do I particularly care, really. I don’t feel that love has any limits and mine for her certainly isn’t and will never be limited to a need to have her for my own. I wrote a rather long entry, the one titled “A ‘Little’ Self-reflection”, that deals with the situation a bit, if you’re interested in spending some time reading it.

May 3, 2008

I hope you weren’t offended by all the comments I left. If you were, please say so so I can apologize. Have a great day. Post again soon!