Christmas Time

The good stuff first.  I got some nice gifts.  Twenty five dollars in a Barnes and Noble Gift Certificate, three hundred dollars from my parents and Grandma, two DVD’s, two books, a Target gift certificate that me and Rob are supposed to share, and some candy.  Oh, and a pair of Christmas socks. 

And, from Melanie, a Diary Plus subscription!  Awesome.    I’ve already started putting chapters in my diary.  I’m not sure how many there are going to be, all in all.  I’ll have to experiment with it.

Last night, I finished a book called Th1rteen R3asons Why.  It’s about a girl who’s committed suicide and this guy named Clay who finds a set of casette tapes at his doorstep.  They’re a message from Hannah, the one who killed herself.  Everyone the tapes have been sent to is involved in one way or another with the main reasons she killed herself.  I’m explaining it badly, but it’s a book that’s all about the ripple effect and how you need to think of what your actions are going to do to another person, because the ripple can spread a lot further than you intend initially.  It was a depressing book to read, especially on Christmas Eve, but it was also a really good one.  I think one of the chapters I’m going to start writing in here is going to be my own list of "13 Reasons" for different things in my life.

On a side note, I E-mailed Mike Keller about a computer problem I’m having.  Minor in the scheme of things, but he knows more about computers than I do, so I figured I’d ask him.  (Mike was pretty much my cmputer expert geek person, and well, yeah . . .)  Anyway, I E-mailed him, giving an outline of the problem and saying that I was asking for his help because he has more experience with computers than I do.  He writes back with a literally three word E-mail and I’m siting there, "Well, this sort of gives me an answer but it doesn’t really help . . ."   So, I come online tonight and whose screen name do I see on my list?  Why, Mike Keller’s!  So I IMed him saying that it was me and was he there?  I didn’t expect him to answer me, but about five, ten minutes later, he did.  We talked a bit and I found out he’s no longer living in NJ.  I knew from his website that he wasn’t in Matawan anymore, but I figured he was still in the state!  But he’s in LIC.  (And for someone who lives as close to NY as I do, I should know what that stands for, but it escapes my memory.  Anyone help me out?)  At the end, I asked if there was any way we could be friends.  I’ll just copy and paste, for your reading (and/or analyzing) pleasure.

Kate: Okay.  I know I may be setting myself up for a fall, but is friendship a possibility between us?  My last question tonight, I promise.

Mike Keller: You imply a dichotomy. But, assuming that dichotomy exists, the distance makes friendship unlikely.

Kate: Long distance friendships can work.

Mike Keller: Then maybe it can happen. But I consider it unlikely, based on empirical data.

Kate: Empirical data?

Mike Keller: past experience

Kate: We’ve barely had any contact in the past three years.  I think it’s safe to say we’ve changed.

Mike Keller: Well, I have to go for now. Good night.

Kate: Good night.  Merry Christmas.

Mike Keller: Merry Christmas.

Kate: Thanks.

And the "Empirical data?" thing was not another question, it was more a statement to the tone of a self-wondering "And that means what now?"  Lol, just wanted to explain that.  Cuz I admit, I don’t know that he would, but it seems to me he *might* be the kind of person to say "You said only one more, that’s a second."

While I admit, he said that he had to go make dinner right before the first line I posted, he seems to want to leave awfully quickly after I said it’s safe to say we’ve changed, don’tcha think?

::Shrugs::  I don’t know what’ll happen.  He said his job is pretty demanding and I know mine is as well, so maybe we never would manage a friendship.  Maybe the best I can hope for is a casual acquaintance type thing.  But, and this’ll undoubtedly be something I cover in my 13 Reasons chapters, I feel like a part of making myself heal from everything with Mike is to force myself out there and to take risks that even I don’t think will get me anywhere.  Because who knows?  Maybe something good’ll come of it.  I admit, things with Mike Keller don’t look especially promising for friendship, but you know what?  His response is a heckuva lot more positive than I was expecting.  To be completely honest, I was expecting a flat-out no.  Something phrased kind of like, "Well, you’re right, that was a expert fall you set up," or something along those lines.  Basically just a way of telling me in flavorful language, yet no uncertain terms, that it wasn’t even a blip on the Possibility Radar.

Who knows, though?

Besides, he did respond in turn with "Merry Christmas."  He could have just signed off.

Maybe Christmas is a time of magic.