Arrogant And Indispensible

There was a rerun of House on last night, as always.  For those who don’t watch the show, Gregory House is basically a medical Sherlock Holmes.  He gets all these weird cases where there are conflicting symptoms, or the usual tests that would prove "here’s what’s wrong" have all come back negative, more or less all the cases that he deems interesting.  He has a team of three other doctors, each that specialize in a different field, named Cameron, Foreman, and Chase.

This is the third season of House and in it, I didn’t see the episode, but I guess House pissed off a cop who decided to go after him any way he could.  And he picked House’s vicodin addiction.  (I didn’t mention that House uses a cane because of a surgery he had concerning death of muscle tissue in his thigh and he takes painkillers almost religiously.  It was proven to be an addiction in the second season when he was bet to go off the stuff for a week.  Yeah, he won the bet, but damn he suffered for it.)  Anyway, in last night’s episode, the cop’s case was going to a hearing to declare if everything would be heard in front of a jury, because thanks to what the cop gathered, House could be looking at ten years.  Cuddy, House’s boss at the hospital, ordered House to talk to the cop, (I wish I could remember his name!) and see if some kind of agreement could be reached because otherwise, House was going to jail.

House did try, he went to the cop and apologized for whatever had initially happened, but the cop didn’t take to it.  He said that words meant nothing from someone like House and that actions prove things; pretty words don’t.  So, House willingly checks himself into rehab.  When the cop visits him, he still won’t talk to the DA to change anything about the case because what do actions matter, coming from someone like House?

The upshot of the episode is, the case was dropped.  I guess House had actually stolen medicine off a dead guy he knew was dead, but when the lawyer asked Cuddy about it, she claimed to have intercepted House’s procuring of the meds and switching the bottle with one of placebos, aka — sugar pills.  She’d fabricated evidence of an inventory list that backed her claim.

House was found in contempt of court for leaving the courtroom for the case he was working on with a patient and was sentenced to a night in jail because of it, but other than that, the judge dismissed the case because of Cuddy’s ‘new evidence.’  (Btw, Cuddy, Cameron, Chase, Foreman, House, yeah, these are all last names.  It’s, if I recall correctly, Allison Cameron, Eric Foreman, Robert Chase, and Lisa Cuddy.  I’ve already said Gregory House is his name.  Oh, and there’s another doctor I haven’t mentioned yet, James Wilson, who’s more or less the Watson of the show.)

Anyway, Cuddy and Wilson come to see him that night in jail and Cuddy’s pissed off, understandably, because she fabricated evidence for him.  And I can’t help wondering what it is about someone like House that makes him so indispensible?  I mean, yeah, he does solve these seemingly impossible cases, but there are bound to be other doctors who can do that, and less painfully to their patients.  Though I think there’s a lot more to the character, outwardly he’s an arrogant bastard who does what he wants when he wants and if people don’t like it, they be damned.  He can get around them, and those he can’t get around, he more or less threatens with, "I have to do this or he/she/they will die."

So why is someone like that someone people keep trying with?  I know, I know, the show’s name is ‘House,’ it’d be kind of pointless to have a show named House without House on it.  Yet I also know if it were real life, everyone in that show, with the possible exception of Wilson because he’s just this idealistic character who believes there’s good in everyone, would have stopped talking to House by now.  If he even still worked at that hospital, the people would put up with him for sake of their jobs and nothing else.  It would be purely business.

Though I suppose the argument can be made that Cameron, Chase, and Foreman stopped putting up with him.  In what I believe was the season finale this year, Cameron and Foreman put in their resignation from his team, and House fired Chase.  I doubt they are, but I hope they haven’t decided to end the series.  It would be a shame to lose this one, it’s too good.

I wonder what qualities make a person that others won’t give up on, though?  It seems everyone gives up on me, yet what makes me so different?  I despise self-pity and try to keep my pity parties, if I have any, to myself, or leak them onto this diary where it’s a person’s choice to read my darker writings.  I write to vent, plain and simple.  And yeah, it sucks when venting comes across as a pity party, but as I’ve said, I don’t expect to be in other peoples’ thoughts.  I don’t write these entries to be pitied or sympathized with.  Yet there are plenty of people who are all, "Oh, my life is so horrible, but I can’t trust anyone enough to say why, so I’m just gonna come on here and be all cryptic and not tell anyone, but I’m truly the most miserable person ever on earth."  And their entries go on whining from there.  Yet they get all the notes — "Oh, people care about you!"  "Yeah, U R cuul."  "U RoCK!"  And so on.  Or the ever-so-encouraging ones that are, like, three-part-+ notes from suckers who think that pointing out the good things, the things said person has, will make any sort of difference.  You know what you almost never see on a diary like that?  Someone saying, "You know what?  Snap out of the damned pity party and GROW UP!"  Or, if you do see that, immediately the noter is jumped on as being insensitive, cruel, or some other description like that.

Yet those people, the whiny, bitchy, "Oh, my life sucks worse than anyone’s ever!" entry people are the ones no one ever wants to give up on.

I’ve become the quiet one in the corner.  The one no one sees because of all the loudmouth "I wanna be the center of attention" people in the middle of the proverbial room.  Nobody sees me, but I observe everyone else.  But it doesn’t matter, because even if I did indulge what I see, it’s not like ayone would believe me, anyway.

I suppose that’s the odd thing about one’s problems.  I know I’m not unique in feeling like this.  Yet in a way, I am.  Because no one I know personally feels this way.  Or I don’t think they do, anyway.  I’m alone in this through unidentification because though strangers on here can note, "You just took my words right out of my head," it connects us only through the very weakest of chains.  I’ve thought atht I was close to several different people I met on this site.  But truly, we were just passing through one another’s worlds.  I don’t think we were meant to stay, and that’s what happens when a random reader, or even someone on a favorites list comes through and reads an entry.  They get a glimpse into the thoughts and mind of another.&n

bsp; They comment.  It makes us feel good for a bit to know someone relates.  But then the moment is gone because there’s no trust between the two so no further revelations can come of it.

I wish I had more than superficial conversations with those around me.  But I barely complain about my problems on here except in a general way.  I don’t want to whine and complain about problems over IM, because I feel selfish when I do so.  Other people have their lives and problems, too, and even when I want to talk to someone else because I feel like I’m coming apart inside, I’ll hear or read about something bad or stressful happening in their life and I put myself on the back burner because I’m truly more worried about them and their situation.

::Sighs::  I don’t know . . .