Life Goes On, And It’s Only Gonna Make Me Stronger

How true that is.  Lol.  Melanie’s notes actually made me teary, because you know something?  I can see Jason and I, years in the future, talking to one another while sitting on the porch of one or the other’s house, talking about these days.  Lol.  Me pulling out a huge binder, (and him groaning,) with all these entries in them, and reminding him of the things we laughed at, the heartaches, the sadness, the happy times . . .  The memories.

She’s right, though, and I do believe it.  It never IS over.  Jason and I left off on good terms, and even though I’m sad and missing him now, I know that someday in the future, we’ll be reunited.  And on the off chance that we aren’t, that our lives do tak such different path that we don’t regain contact, I have closure.  We didn’t leave off on an argument, and I know that I walked away from someone I consider a best friend, and someone who considers me a best friend.  Even if we never see each other again, I know that he’s my best friend, and that I’m his.  I learned what unconditional love is because of him.  That alone is reason never to forget him.

Oh, and as far as meeting Mike Keller, you haven’t, Melanie.  In fact, the only three people who I know read this diary who have met him are Mike, Joey, and Shannon.

I’m gonna be missing Jason for awhile.  I feel like I did back in May, except without the anger.  The depression, the loneliness, that’s the same.  And seeing things that I know he’d like that I’m unable to give him.  I didn’t even wish him a happy birthday this year.  I wish I had.  I wish I’d been able to give him that balloon at the dollar store, the heart shaped one with the piano design and the music notes on it.