2/19/09

Well… I ended up going to my favorite LSS, and I found the PERFECT paper, but it’s not glittery.  AND, wow, was it expensive.  It actually is velvet paper.  It’s SOOO cool.  I cut down most of my pictures to 3 and 1/4th square, and then matted them with a heart corner adorner.  It looks really good.  So far, there’s no glitter anywhere, nothing shiny at all.  But I would not go so far as to call this subdued either.  It’s really very bright and cheery.  I REALLY struggled to put it together though, I have to admit.  I just wasn’t sure how I was going to do 12 photos on 2 sheets of paper without it looking… crappily overcrowded.  I’m liking how it’s turning out though.  However, I had to split the journaling up, because there was too much story to tell in just one small space that I had on the one side.  Besides, it can be SO interesting to have a lot to read… and that IS where my real talent lies, in the story telling.

So… we went and filed a bankruptcy today, well, Jerry did.  HOW this is going to work out, I’m not sure…but it was necessary to buy time.  I can’t help but think, whatever Jerry does, he’d better do it quick.  I don’t know what the bank will have to say about this filing, but I about promise it won’t be liked.  I sat in the van and fed Alex while he did it.  We’d had lunch before hand at Hometown, and she sure did enjoy her grilled cheese sandwich, fish (seemed to enjoy that…), macroni and cheese, and mashed potatoes.  I am not sure how much she drank, and she kept pulling off to look at other things, but we sat there for probably half an hour.  I was really glad to see how full her diaper was this morning, lol… yea, I KNOW… but she usually doesn’t have that much pee, and it’s a worry.  The reglan is really helping, but I also wonder if she’s maybe getting better at keeping the supply up.  That one’s hard to tell… of course it helps tremendously that we’re back to feeding through the night.  I guess I would have to go off the reglan to see if she kept the supply up on her own.  That would be the only way to tell.

Oh, Shabree is crying… Jerry won’t take her to the library with him (she bugs too much and he can barely work).  I don’t blame him at all.  And you can never believe Shabree’s promises, they mean nothing.  Alex is down for a nap, Sammi is playing, Jerry just left to pick up Becca.  Sydni is eating melted chocolate, much to my dismay.

I had the WORST dream this morning, it was a nightmare really.  I dreamed that I found Alex in the tub, floating, with a pillow, that it appeared someone had tried to prop her up on while they gave her a bath, only no one was there, and the tub was nearly full.  I grabbed her, going "Please be all right, Please be all right"  I was having trouble getting her turned around to empty her lungs.  I woke up in a panic.  It was SO real.  My heart was racing.  I hated that dream.  I’ve been worrying far too much, it’s unhealthy.  I can’t seem to help it though.  I wonder if this is something I should bring up to the doctor?  I just don’t want to be put on any medication… would rather not be having to take that kind of medicine. 

Shabree is just a mess.  She wonders why no one trusts her.  Sigh… probably because she cannot keep a promise if her life depended on it.    She lost her homework again, but Sydni got it for her. 

I’ve got to wrap up, I guess.  Shabree needs some help with her homework, and I’m going to go write in my family blog.