5/26/06
Quick entry today… tonight. I should be in bed, or at the least, scrapping-(working on swaps, who am I kidding about getting anything into my scrapbook???-Well, actually, I DID do two pages for Samantha’s album. No pictures yet, of course, but except for some brads, the layout is pretty much done, and I’ll be forced to take pictures of her. Sometimes I just DON’T. I forget my camera half the time, and while I LOVE my camera, it’s big and bulky, and it gets to be a PITA to carry around, so I just don’t. Now when I DO haul it out, I take 100 pictures at a time, at a minimum. For Bec’s birthday THIS year, I took 700, the year before, 1000! I had a NINE page layout for that birthday. I took it out yesterday to get pics of the kids in the pool, and I have no idea how many I took, probably 100, maybe 150. Now, I obviously won’t be able to USE all those, but I’ll get at LEAST 8 good ones, and that’s all I need. Well, maybe 12, and I’ll do a 3 or 4 page layout instead of just 2. But I love my pool layouts, and have the layout half planned out in my head. I do that. I plan to take pictures around layouts I want to do. I think most scrapbookers who are addicted do that. Of course, there are "event" scrappers, and I do those as well, but it is a lot of fun just to show the family having fun. I still need to do a layout of Shabree getting her ears pierced. She’s so cute in one picture, in tears, but trying to smile. She had them out for almost two weeks awhile back, I thought for sure they’d close back up, but nope, I got her earrings back in… thankfully! I would NOT want to have to re-pierce them, poor baby.
I’ve been going through past swaps, looking for things I can use in my scrapbooks. I’ve found quite a few things, now I just have to get the pictures printed and actually DO the layouts. That of course, is the hardest part. I’m getting BAD about wanting my layouts to look "just so" because I’m getting to be a better scrapper. But then, there are times you just want to get it done, and have it in the album.
I know, I think, eat, live and breathe scrapbooking. I just love it.
So in other news… the zoloft is DEFINITELY helping… YAY!!!!
I feel calmer
I feel happier
I’m dealing with fewer scary thoughts and visions
I feel more like cleaning (I’m not necessarily DOING it, but I’m feeling like it, lol. I usually end up scrapping instead)
I’m not yelling nearly as much as I was
Plus, I’m not feeling so nauseated… some, but not as bad as when they first put me on it. I’ve learned to put something in my tummy, and don’t over-eat.
I’m really glad the zoloft is doing its job. I needed to do SOMETHING. I mean, it’s hard to quantify really how my emotional state was affecting me, my relationship with Jerry and the girls, but I could see it was definitely affecting things a lot. I feel much better. So now I’ll just hope and even pray a little, that Samantha doesn’t suffer because of all of this.
Okay, I gotta go get some sleep… and if I can’t sleep, then I’ll work on the book, or a swap, or something. I’ve been sleeping on the couch, because it’s the ONLY place I can get comfortable enough to sleep. Jerry’s taken over the whole bed, lol. He told me to let him know if I wan’t going to sleep there, so he can do that. Thankfully, he doesn’t seem hurt in the least that I’m sleeping on the couch, and I’m getting MUCH better sleep there. Of course, we’re NOT one of those couples who cuddles all night, because he generates so much body heat, that neither of us can stand being that hot all night, and I really am so sensitive, that I can’t really sleep when I’m touched or breathed on… but mostly it’s just the body heat.
Hm, so much for a quick entry. But then, I could ALWAYS go on in my diaries I’ve kept over the years… most of which I burned a few years back… I just hated reading them anyway, and wanted the history contained GONE for the most part. I’ve never regretted burning those diaries, I must say… LOTS of whining and desperation in them, not worth remembering.