black cat
curiouser and curiouser
i took a long walk today. alone. no music no voices no bodies. just me and my brain. i went down lawrence road.. walked through a feild and sat ontop of a hill and watched the sunset behind a dreamy neighborhood. i get so jealous – no, envious, of that sort of thing. a house, and a family. thats all i want, to come home to a house and family. that all seems so foriegn to me. so i sit on hills, or take jogs through these perefect neighborhoods, actually just this one. and i take a deep breathte and pretend its mine. pretend i live in one of those houses and my mom and dad are waiting for me to come home. but then it gets dark and a long walk down a road with no shoulder reminds me of my place.
i dont like feeling a void, i cant put my finger on it, but something is out of place with me right now.
something deep.
i took photos along my adventure today. if im up to it i will upload them in the morning.
as for now… its me in a room full of empty things. maybe thats becoming me too.
love.love
Randm noter…i feel for you hun <:( *hug*
Warning Comment
Darling, the void is dangerous. Mine has not left. I wanted a house and a family, and I began to have it…but I was still empty. The search continues. You are in my thoughts more than you probably realize. Be well dear, I look forward to your photos.
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Yeah, thinking has always been my downfall.
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ah sometimes its awful being left with your thoughts. its like a self distruction. *hugs* i hope you can fill that void! maybe use a Quiji board!? like the little arrow thing? haha hm, i’m attempting a joke and i believe i’m failing at it haha! *hugshugs!*
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It’s an incredible sensation. You should def try it sometime. And no it isn’t =p
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