an ending

I found Open Diary back in high school.

It was easy to be myself then. Perhaps it was easier to like myself, too, or to trust the future Mickella to get it all figured out in ways I still haven’t.

A marvelous marriage, a four year stint as a teacher, and three pretty delightful children later, I still find it is when I occasionally open the familiar OD website that I am at my most honest.

I can’t say why. The sweetness of the OD community has always been breathtaking, and that must be part of it. But something about OD always makes me feel like I’m writing a letter to some very dear, a very long lost friend who can always pick up with me wherever I am, however long it’s been, effortlessly.

I will miss that more than I can say, and doubt I’ll ever be able to duplicate the level of openness and creativity I’ve enjoyed here anywhere else, perhaps even not on paper.

Goodbye, OD. You’ve housed some of my fondest memories. You’ve also kept vigil with me during dark and tumultuous seasons, and I’ve felt loved and sustained here, no matter how ridiculous I later discovered myself to have been.

I love you.