Every time a bell rings…

An Angel gets its wings.

I didn’t hear a bell, but something miraculous happened yesterday.  I realized it about five minutes after it started.

I was thinking again about how I don’t provide a good example for my grandchildren; all the reasons I’m a BAD influence on them, when somehow, my thoughts turned to a computer problem.  You know, my chosen field of interest in life?  Well, besides singing.  I don’t even know HOW I started thinking about a computer problem; it just happened.  Then I realized a few things.

God was holding on to me and making sure I held on to myself.  I don’t have a clue what my purpose on this planet is, but I know I have one, and He had to interrupt my destructive thinking.  There was NO hope, this time.  I was thinking about writing "the letter", no matter how long it took, then figuring out a way to kill myself.  I didn’t even think it would hurt anybody, because if I’m a negative influence, they should be happy I’m gone.

Then, somehow, that computer issue popped into my head.  I guess because I was thinking about typing the letter first, then probably writing it by hand, after I printed it, so I had it just the way I wanted it, and it was more personal, if written by hand.  Anyway, next thing I know, I’m going geek, and I stopped thinking about killing myself.

I also thought how Memaw must have felt.  She never accomplished a career or made a lot of money or things like that.  For the most part, she was an old-fashioned housewife, mother, grand-,great-,and great-great-grandmother.  But oh, she was SUCH a wonderful person, and what a great success in life she was!  She taught me more than anyone else, and I thought she was the greatest person in the world.  I hope that doesn’t hurt my Mama, for me to say that, but I don’t think it does.  After all, her Mama was the greatest person SHE knew, too! 🙂  And Mama’s not far from what Memaw was.

My guardian Angel was looking after me, yesterday, and I know it.  I’m lucky to know that.