Big step toward recovery

 

 

 

 

 

My Mikey, I love you

 

∞ • π³ + 1

 

 

 

 

Lately, I have felt much, much better.  I’m talking about the past two or three days.  I’ll tell you how it happened, don’t worry.

Apparently, I do my best when I say what I need to to those that I feel need to hear it.  I don’t have to say it directly, but I have to say it…period.  In this case (as is pretty usual), it is in song.

I got a LOT of things off my chest in writing the last album’s worth of songs.  I realized that there is a song for almost everyone I’ve been angry with or bothered by in any fashion.

In "Pushin’ To Survive", I tell my mother how much it hurt me that she never defended me, and how she STILL deserts me when I need her, but I’m pushing to survive and coping in my own way, no matter how others feel about it.

In "Pulled", I am talking to two abusive men in our family…..Adam and Frankie.  They are mean to our daughter and our sister, respectively, and I’m telling them that we see through them.  They want us to think one thing, but we see what they’re REALLY doing, and it needs to STOP!

In "Elisabeth’s Song", I’m just asking how she is, telling her we love her, and hoping to get it across to her that we need her and miss her.

In "Part of Living", I’m talking to a lot of people, including me.  It’s about how some people wonder all the time why they have to hurt.  I tell us that it does no good to hold on to the past….let it go because it’s over, and we can’t change it.  What is the future if we live by old pain?!  It’s my effort to convince myself and some others I love to get on with our lives and accept it, because it’s all part of living.

In "My Fight Song", I am confronting myself and telling myself, "I see through you, too, you know!"  I portray a boxing match, in which I will emerge victorious in my effort to change for the better.  I may be a beginner, but I’m still a winner!

In "Fill The Space", I tell everyone that I see emotional pain on others’ faces.  They’d see it, too, if only they REALLY looked.  We have so much space around our hearts that we COULD share…..fill up that space and love our fellow people a little bit better!

In "One Thing", I’m aiming to tell My Mikey just a few things that I like about him, me, and us.  It’s important to hear those things, so I plan to keep telling my baby!

In "Timeless", I send my own message to people I love who have died through the years.  I open by telling them I’ve been thinking of them and I thought they should know.  I know they hear it.  God knows I feel it.  They’re all timeless….especially Daddy….because they all live on in me.  Thank God for memories!

In "Smell A Rose", I take a sarcastic, spontaneous outlook on some things.  It’s just my way of having fun, poking fun at some people, and being happy in the long run, anyway.

And in "Waiting For Love", I’m telling my two favorite "T-people", Tiffany and Tim, that they’ve been focused so hard on having someone else to love them that they forget to love themselves, sometimes.  If only they could see themselves the way I see them.  Boy, they’d be the self-lovingest people ever!!!!!

 

Much love to everyone.  Thank you, if you read all through this.

 

Jack